Elevate Your Life: Playing a Bigger Game - Seven Principles to Experience Fulfillment

Transcript

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Stop identifying as an undisciplined person, and what that means is have you ever said the words I don't have the discipline for that?

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Stop that.

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Yes, and we all.

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By the way, my hand went up too.

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Okay, both hands.

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So this is not, marcus, pointing a finger at you and being like, see, you deserve no, I have so much mercy because I was once you.

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I was that person.

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Our language is so important.

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Hey, uncommon Leaders, welcome back.

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This is the Uncommon Leader Podcast and I'm your host, john Gallagher.

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Today I've got Marcus Collius, who shares transformational insights from his journey of personal growth and the wisdom he's compiled in his newly released book Play a Bigger Game.

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Marcus details a profound realization on a plane ride that sparked his passion for meaningful conversations and personal development.

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In this episode, you'll hear Marcus discuss the power of positive self-talk, the impact of diet on overall well-being and the transformative potential of simple tools like sticky notes.

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We'll dive into the seven foundational principles in his book and explore the importance of setting high personal standards.

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Whether you're seeking more wins or trying to overcome limiting beliefs.

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This episode is packed with actionable insights and heartfelt stories.

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Let's get started.

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Let's get started, Marcus Collius.

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Welcome to the Uncommon Leader Podcast.

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I am so looking forward to our conversation today.

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How are you doing?

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John, I'm having an amazing day.

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I'm psyched to be here, I'm psyched for this conversation and I think we're going to be giving your listeners some big, actionable advice today.

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It's going to be fun Well, that's what we love to do and I am looking forward to be giving your listeners some big, actionable advice today.

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It's going to be fun Well, that's what we love to do and I am looking forward to chatting about your recently released book and you can see it behind my shoulder over there Play a Bigger Game and it's been a lot of fun.

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Seven principles that you basically have instilled in your life and are now teaching others through their journey, so I can't wait to get the chance to have a conversation with you about that.

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But I want to start you off.

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I won't give you any break with the same question.

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I always start my first time guests on the Uncommon Leader podcast, and that's to ask you to tell me a story from your childhood that may still impact who you are as a person or a leader today.

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Oh, I love this question and I'm sure there's about a thousand different stories that I could give you.

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You know, I'm going to start by just prefacing it by saying I love my backstory.

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There's so much pain in my backstory, but please don't carry any of that as, oh, please pity me or anything like that.

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In fact, the reason I want to tell this one story I'm going to talk about my parents' divorce because it messed me up for so many years, and what I'm hoping people are going to really hear out of this story is something that they can relate to for one.

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But number two is no matter how painful your backstory, you can turn it into something absolutely beautiful.

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We all have an origin story and, if you like, superheroes, man.

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They had to go through something really difficult and it was usually painful to become the superhero that they were today.

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So for me, when I was seven years old, my parents divorced.

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Now they had already a crappy marriage, and that's their words, not just mine.

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I never really got to see love in that house.

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But when I was seven and they called it quits, my dad was officially out and my mom had to go back to school full time and work full time to provide for us four kids.

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So I lost both of my parents on that day.

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That screwed me up so bad.

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I mean, it's one thing to be a boy without a father that screws a dude up but now to not have a mother as well.

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Man, I had to learn so much so young and, of course, if you asked me when I was 12 or 13, I'd be like this is the worst.

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This is why I won't do anything with my life.

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But you asked me today and I would say that's exactly why I do everything and you can learn so much from it.

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And one of the great starting places because I speak to so many people about that it's like, yeah, but Marcus, I got some real pain.

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I don't even know what the first step is.

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The first step is to say, hey, is there anything good in my life today, or who I am today?

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Because of that?

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There's always beautiful gifts in it.

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So, oh, yeah, I'm a more compassionate person, I'm a more independent person, I'm a stronger person.

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For me, the amount I love my wife and my children and will be there for my children every single day of their lives, well, that's because of that divorce.

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So it was such a gift for Marcus.

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It's tough to see at the time.

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Absolutely tough to see at the time.

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Thank you so much for sharing that.

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I know it has to be a tough story but, as a lot of folks will talk about, in this community, in this world that we live in today, as many cannot overcome that pain, but when you can find your purpose through that pain that you've had and you can identify, just like you said, who you are today as a result of that, sometimes it's the way we don't want to be, sometimes it's absolutely the way we do want to be, and how we learn through that can be very powerful.

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We have a common connection in Rory Vaden, who says you're most powerfully positioned to help the person that you once were.

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There's so much truth in that statement.

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It's what brought me to Grand Builders Group just a year and a half ago.

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We kind of touched on that before we hit record on the podcast.

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But it was something that was really there for me as well, and maybe when I get a chance to be on your podcast I can tell that story how it works for me.

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But we're not here to talk about me.

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We're absolutely here to talk about you and the value that you're adding to your community now, which has been unreal and uncommon when you think about simply just the results and I'm looking forward to hearing more about the process, but you have ultimately, just in looking at some of the numbers, you've been the founder of multiple eight and nine-figure businesses.

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You grew your supplement company from a startup in your dorm room or in your college apartment to 170 million, helped clients lose over 3 million pounds and have impacted over 10 million people.

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Those are uncommon results.

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So when you think about writing playing a bigger game or play a bigger game, that has to be something that you're encouraging folks to do.

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So let's start right there.

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With regards to the title, where did the title come from?

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Who are you writing this book for?

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Oh, wow, do I ever love this?

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I'm going to answer this in an unorthodox way, if it's okay.

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So, first of all, play bigger game.

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It is the way I live my life.

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It's a movement.

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And play bigger game for clarity purposes.

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It means if you believe you could be doing more with your life, like there is a bigger game to be played in your life, around you.

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This world has more to offer you than what you're experiencing right now Then I invite you to play a bigger game in life.

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It truly is an invitation.

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And these principles in this book there's pretty simple principles Like.

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This is a pretty easy read.

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I don't pretend to be someone.

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I'm not and it's truly just my language.

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So if anybody listening to this is like, actually, I kind of like the way this guy talks, I like his energy, then this book is for you.

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And one of the most important things, by the way, take the challenges.

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You have to take action on this stuff.

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If you just learn this stuff and do nothing with it, nothing's going to change.

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So my encouragement to you is you must take action.

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But I was going to answer your question in an unorthodox way and say first who this book is not for If you are listening to this and going, you know what I am experiencing.

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Everything I want to out of life, I feel fulfillment.

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I win constantly.

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I am killing it in life.

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I am just cheering you on going.

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That's amazing.

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And if that was your answer, by the way, will you reach out to me Because I want to hear some of your secrets?

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I would love to learn from you and I'm I just want to be clear, that was not condescending in any way Like I love to learn and if you are winning that much, I want to know what some of your secrets are.

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But if you want to know some of my secrets, or if you are the person who's like, well, I'm not fully fulfilled, like, yeah, I get some wins, would I like some more wins in life?

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Yeah, of course, who wouldn't?

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I'd like to feel more fulfilled and, just for clarity, fulfillment.

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How many people do you know in your life who experience great things, who maybe have a phenomenal job or making great money or seem like they've got a great family life, but when you actually talk to them, they're not fulfilled, they don't have joy in their life, they feel somehow stuck and you're like what?

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But everything seems so good, because if you don't have the right mindset, you could have everything you've ever dreamed of and still be unhappy, still feel unfulfilled.

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And that's one of the things I love to help people with, because I was really on that path for many years and I was chasing things that I didn't even want until I learned how to structure proper perspective, proper mindset.

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Now not only do I win tons, but I actually get to experience the win, I get to experience the fulfillment and I get to share that with everybody around me.

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Oh man, that really excites me because to me, real success is watching others succeed and experience everything that they dreamed of experiencing in this life.

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Marcus, I love that in a story and I love that you talked about the framework of the book as well, with the challenges, to make sure that you finish the challenges.

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I mean each of the seven principles outlines many stories that you've gone through, certainly that inspirational quotes, biblical verses that exist in terms of what has impacted you as well, and then you finish, kind of each section, if you will, with a challenge and then an advanced challenge.

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And I agree I think you should be thinking about how you complete those challenges and I know the things that you've been on.

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I mean, I see inside the book your pictures on the front of Ironman magazine and muscle and fitness magazine as to where you've been on the other side, of how you got started and the some fruits of those principles that you've lived over time.

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I think folks can learn a lot just from that structure in terms of how it goes forward and what they'll be able to do.

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Let's maybe touch on a little bit of those.

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Well, no, before I get to the seven principles I want you to share, because I think we've got a couple things at least in common with regards to our stories.

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First of all, height-wise, you're a pretty tall guy 6'4".

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I'm 6'4" as well, so I was grateful enough.

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I may have been on the other side of what your story is, though I was the overweight kid as they got taller and I ended up, even as an older adult, being around 6'4", 270 pounds before I needed to make my changes as well.

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But again, not about me, it's about your story.

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Tell me about the story of your uh time as a tall, skinny person, if you will, and what was the catalyst for some of the change that you had?

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Oh, thank you for asking, but I first wanted to celebrate with you, brother.

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You look phenomenal.

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You look phenomenal.

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Clearly, what you did was so good for you, for your life and for all your relationships.

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Man, I can even see it in your skin.

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It looks good on you, this healthy version of you.

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So, man kudos to you.

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I appreciate that, Marcus.

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Thank you.

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Yeah, giddy up, yeah for me.

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When I first finished my Lithuanian growth spurt, I was not even 14 years old 6'4", 120 pounds.

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Ladies, hold on to your hats.

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It was so tough and it was awkward and I was uncoordinated and I was so embarrassed of how I looked and I stood out and then the bullies started to tell me who I was and I believed them and it was just such a sucky path.

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And you know, one of the things I really recognize and going back to that quote that we talk about, with Rory Vaden saying you're most powerfully positioned to help the person you once were as adults, who clearly got stuck at that young age, who got spoken to by those same bullies telling them this is who you are, no, you're not that good, this is the crap that you are.

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And they got stuck there and they took it into their whole life with them.

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And so one of my one thing on my heart so much mercy for all those people.

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And I just want to help people get unstuck.

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And it's a choice, it's just a choice.

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One day I chose, I got called to choose a different path for my life, and this is a fun story in my book and it's really a defining moment in my life.

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It's 15 years old.

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I was on a plane and I really felt God say, hey, where you're going right now, no one knows who you are, so you could be who you want to be.

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Like what if those bullies never said any of those things?

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Who would you be when you got off this plane?

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I stepped off that plane with this kind of confidence and I was just this the version of me that I wanted to be.

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I wasn't pretending to be someone I wasn't.

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I was letting the real me out, and that's who people accepted.

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This world is so eager to accept the best version of you, whatever version you're going to present.

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So why do we choose to present this?

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Well, hi, I'm Marcus.

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Please don't look at me or talk to me.

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I was like, yeah, I'm Marcus and this is who I am, and that was the radical change that I made at 15.

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And now I've been on that path ever since, and what I've learned since then has been so beautiful.

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So I want to give people two key takeaways right here.

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Number one is this you just make a choice.

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You don't have to hear from God, you don't have to wait till you're on a plane, go in somewhere.

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You can say you know what, I heard what this guy said and I'm going to take it and I'm going to try it tomorrow.

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I'm just going to be a more confident person tomorrow.

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Watch how that changes everything.

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That's one characteristic change.

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You can change as many or as little as you want.

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But the second piece, the actual advice here, is I recognize that, hey, if I want to be this version of myself not just here then I'm going to have to create certain habits that allow this to become my reality.

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And then I committed myself to doing those habits, creating those habits, being those habits.

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And it's because of that that I can choose to be whoever I want, I can do whatever I want, I can take on any career and I'm so confident that I'll be successful in it.

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And I don't mean that in a cocky way, I mean that in a here's the answer to life everybody If you truly believe you have that control, you truly believe you have that power and you're willing to do what it takes, Marcus, I so appreciate that and I appreciate you also outlining that with those two takeaways.

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Also, I love the visualization of kind of going away and making a choice to be different and folks don't know you sit in that space in their minds with regards to what that is, and it continues to fill them with the limiting beliefs.

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To be able to transport yourself into a space where you know you, you believe you're not in that location anymore and when those things happen in the past, it's so challenging yet can be so rewarding, so powerful with regards to what's happening.

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I often think about.

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You know even the social media world they would live in and how tough it is.

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You know the old, the old Facebook theory of you know Facebook's for the folks that you used to know and Twitter's for the people that you need to know and LinkedIn is for the people that you, you know, have to know if you want to get any further.

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But that Facebook, you know, back story, that always exists there in our minds, uh, as one that can be really something that holds us back.

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So to be able to let that go, to make that choice one of the principles that you talk about in your book, the choice to do that and then, secondly, to ultimately lead to the lifestyle and disciplines that you need, to another principle inside of your book.

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Those are two very important things that are critical.

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I don't want to go over all seven.

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We don't have time to do all seven but I do.

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I know discipline plays a very important role in that activity.

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I know it did for you simply because of the book.

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The chapter on discipline is three times as long as any of the other chapters.

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I noticed that today in terms of going forward.

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So you think about discipline, you talk about two of those takeaways the story, but tell folks one or two crazy discipline fitness habits you have that took you from that sale.

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That would have blown you away if you'd have held an umbrella at 6'4 and 120 to where you are today and continue to be.

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I love this and I love what you're detecting, what's registering with you, because you're so right.

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I did a really long discipline section and it's later in the book because I wanted to get people warmed up first.

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But I think discipline is something that's really lacking in this world, and I don't mean that as a negative and a put down, but I think the average person identifies as an undisciplined person, and so that's a big problem.

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So I do want to answer your question, but I want to start with something actionable.

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Stop identifying as an undisciplined person, and what that means is have you ever said the words I don't have the discipline for that?

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Stop that.

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Yes, I, and we all, by the way, my hand went up too.

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Okay, both hands.

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So this is this is not, marcus, pointing a finger at you and being like see you, you deserve, but no, I have so much mercy because I was once you.

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I was that person.

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Our language is so important, so my encouragement to you is immediately start, today.

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Say you know what.

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I am a disciplined person, and really quick.

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I know you're going to go, but, marcus, I know I'm not.

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Let me tell you all the reasons I'm not.

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Why don't you start by telling me all the reasons that you are.

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If you tell me there's nothing in your life that shows that you're a disciplined person, I would say you're.

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Probably.

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You're not lying, but you're just overlooking it.

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And what's happening is your brain registers what you want it to register.

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So if you say I'm an undisciplined person, it goes oh yeah, you're right here.

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Let me show you all the things you don't.

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Remember when you cheated on your diet.

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Remember when you did this and this and this.

00:18:36.269 --> 00:18:39.740
But if you said, no, I am a disciplined person, let me think about it for a second.

00:18:39.740 --> 00:18:41.167
You can think about.

00:18:41.167 --> 00:18:44.798
There's so many opportunities to prove that you're a disciplined person.

00:18:44.798 --> 00:18:46.884
Did you wake up to an alarm today?

00:18:46.884 --> 00:18:48.768
Most people did.

00:18:48.768 --> 00:18:49.496
Guess what?

00:18:49.496 --> 00:18:51.000
That took discipline.

00:18:51.000 --> 00:18:55.148
Now, even if you say but Marcus, I hit the snooze twice.

00:18:55.148 --> 00:18:58.541
Ok, that's fair, but you didn't hit it four times.

00:18:58.541 --> 00:19:00.465
That took discipline.

00:19:00.465 --> 00:19:03.519
There you can prove it to yourself.

00:19:03.519 --> 00:19:08.588
And the more you prove it to yourself, the more you're going to be looking for that next win, that next proof.

00:19:08.588 --> 00:19:13.805
And then, within weeks or a month or a couple of months, you're going to go, you know what.

00:19:13.805 --> 00:19:16.809
And then, within weeks or a month or a couple months, you're going to go.

00:19:16.809 --> 00:19:17.491
You know what?

00:19:17.491 --> 00:19:22.718
I am totally a disciplined person now and you can point that discipline at anything you want to point it at.

00:19:22.718 --> 00:19:37.898
And I am so sure discipline is one of the key principles of life that if you become a truly disciplined person and pointed at anything you choose to, you will become an absolute rock star in whatever that is, whatever you choose to point that discipline at.

00:19:39.161 --> 00:19:51.923
So, to answer your question and it's also going to hopefully help the audience as well, because in my opinion by the way, I've been in fitness and the fitness industry for over 25 years.

00:19:51.923 --> 00:20:01.864
I've been blessed to be on the cover of over 15 international fitness magazines, but here it is Number one diet is everything.

00:20:01.864 --> 00:20:06.816
Diet is 90, maybe 95% of how you look.

00:20:06.816 --> 00:20:19.303
You can train until you're almost dead, but if you don't have your diet right, you will not get the body you desire and, more importantly, you're not going to feel the way you want to.

00:20:19.904 --> 00:20:31.602
With the right foods, the right fuel, the right data I'm putting into my mouth, my brain does what I want it to do, my energy is where I want it to be, I sleep properly, my gut feels great.

00:20:31.602 --> 00:20:38.616
Those are really important keys to really enjoying life we don't even, we just take.

00:20:38.616 --> 00:20:51.463
We just allow our upset stomach, our discomfort, our inflammation, our headaches to dictate our life so much and again, I have so much mercy for everybody out there we don't know what we don't know.

00:20:51.463 --> 00:21:12.861
So hopefully you're listening to this and going okay, maybe, maybe I'm going to give this guy a try and, by the way, in my book I don't go into great detail into diet and whatnot, but I give you some basics that will get you very far, because there's some key little secrets that if you just do these little things, you can have a rockstar diet.

00:21:12.861 --> 00:21:19.482
You can have the body you desire, the mind you desire, the energy that you desire, you can have the life you desire.

00:21:20.605 --> 00:21:23.798
Hey listeners, I want to take a quick moment to share something special with you.

00:21:23.798 --> 00:21:31.757
Many of the topics and discussions we have on this podcast are areas where I provide coaching and consulting services for individuals and organizations.

00:21:31.757 --> 00:21:45.127
If you've been inspired by our conversation and are seeking a catalyst for change in your own life or within your team, I invite you to visit coachjohngallaghercom forward slash free call to sign up for a free coaching call with me.

00:21:45.127 --> 00:21:53.142
It's an opportunity for us to connect, discuss your unique challenges and explore how coaching or consulting can benefit you and your team.

00:21:53.142 --> 00:21:57.915
Okay, let's get back to the show.

00:21:58.816 --> 00:22:01.758
Thank you for sharing that and I thank you for sharing the disciplines that are there for you.

00:22:01.758 --> 00:22:04.980
Again and I did notice in the book you've got some nutritional guides.

00:22:04.980 --> 00:22:07.461
You cannot out-exercise a bad diet.

00:22:07.461 --> 00:22:08.560
There's no doubt about that.

00:22:08.560 --> 00:22:20.467
Inside of the choice to go along with those changes that you make inside of the choice to go along with those changes that you make inside of the choice chapter, you encourage individuals that they start on this journey, not to push their standard on others.

00:22:20.467 --> 00:22:22.347
Tell me a little bit more about that as well.

00:22:23.048 --> 00:22:24.429
Oh, I love that you're bringing this up.

00:22:24.429 --> 00:22:26.089
This is one of my favorite things to talk about.

00:22:26.089 --> 00:22:30.873
Honestly, I want to talk really quickly about expectations versus standards.

00:22:30.873 --> 00:22:39.665
So expectations, this is such a dangerous thing in people's lives and it's been such a problem in my past life.

00:22:39.665 --> 00:22:57.036
We hold others to expectations that are absolutely unreasonable, and not just others, but other situations, and I won't go into this story, but I'll say this how many people, when they're traveling, hold absolutely unrealistic expectations of how the day should go?

00:22:57.036 --> 00:23:04.917
I, for one know many times when my flight was delayed 15 to 20 minutes and I was losing my crap.

00:23:04.917 --> 00:23:08.685
And I look back and I go are you serious, marcus?

00:23:08.685 --> 00:23:09.929
15 to 20 minutes?

00:23:09.929 --> 00:23:14.009
Why were you expecting everything to be perfect, do you?

00:23:14.050 --> 00:23:15.797
not know how air travel works, marcus.

00:23:15.797 --> 00:23:23.183
But worse, I was ruining my time and the time of everyone around me, including my family, and that upsets me so much.

00:23:23.183 --> 00:23:37.391
So one of the things that I've learned and again I talk about this in the book, but I love talking about this is to hold others to low expectations and I know that has negative sounding connotations, so we'll talk about it in a second but hold others to low expectations and I know that has negative sounding connotations, so we'll talk about it in a second but hold them to low expectations.

00:23:37.391 --> 00:23:39.422
Hold yourself to high standards.

00:23:39.422 --> 00:23:42.182
So who do you want to show up as?

00:23:42.182 --> 00:23:43.601
This is your standard.

00:23:44.255 --> 00:23:52.806
And if you have this kind of diet, this kind of exercise, this kind of sleep, why are you trying to hold others to rules that they didn't sign up for?

00:23:52.806 --> 00:23:54.461
They don't even know them?

00:23:54.461 --> 00:23:56.798
Doesn't that sound crazy to go?

00:23:56.798 --> 00:24:03.480
Ah, john, you didn't live up to the podcast host I thought you would be, and it's like whoa.

00:24:03.480 --> 00:24:04.944
Who did you think I was going to be?

00:24:04.944 --> 00:24:07.241
By the way, you are an exceptional host.

00:24:07.722 --> 00:24:08.365
I appreciate that.

00:24:08.875 --> 00:24:12.938
But it's just crazy that we do that, and we especially do that to our spouses.

00:24:12.938 --> 00:24:21.356
I did that to my spouse for many years and praise God she is such a wonderful, kind, gentle woman that she put up with that younger Marcus.

00:24:21.356 --> 00:24:29.847
And now we're together 20 years and I just have so much love and respect for her and, honestly, I want to keep being a better version of myself.

00:24:29.847 --> 00:24:34.739
I want to keep bettering Marcus so that Brooke gets a better husband every single day.

00:24:37.121 --> 00:24:37.520
So cool.

00:24:37.520 --> 00:24:43.513
When I think about that and those expectations, the difference in the standards and expectations it's really powerful.

00:24:43.513 --> 00:24:59.756
There's a quote right in your introduction that you talk about too is that when you make extraordinary change, so when you start to hold yourself to those standards what I'm making up about that statement there will be many who prefer you as weak and average, and not that new person.

00:24:59.756 --> 00:25:01.686
Tell me a little bit about where that quote came from.

00:25:02.779 --> 00:25:05.566
Oh, so you know, this is what.

00:25:05.566 --> 00:25:08.491
This is why a lot of people start on a new path.

00:25:08.491 --> 00:25:16.903
They start on a new diet, they start in a new exercise regime, they start listening to Tony Robbins or Marcus Collius and they start going you know what?

00:25:16.903 --> 00:25:18.144
I'm going to change my life.

00:25:18.144 --> 00:25:24.920
But then they go back to their same friends, their same family, and some of those people are like whoa, what are you better than me?

00:25:24.920 --> 00:25:32.833
And they might not even use those words, but you know that's what they're really saying, and one of the reasons is you're bringing out their insecurities.

00:25:32.833 --> 00:25:47.333
They're so worried about losing you, the person that they had in their lives, because if you grow, if you become the better version of yourself, you might leave this version behind this, this human being who's not willing to grow.

00:25:47.333 --> 00:25:50.748
And unfortunately, what it turns out is a lot of people go.

00:25:50.748 --> 00:25:52.980
Well, then you need to grow or else I'm out of here.

00:25:52.980 --> 00:25:56.986
That doesn't work for anybody, so please don't do that.

00:25:56.986 --> 00:26:00.411
But it's a really important warning.

00:26:00.611 --> 00:26:05.503
And I was so blessed, you know, on the flight home when I was 15.

00:26:05.503 --> 00:26:09.531
So I just had three weeks where I got to be this new human being.

00:26:09.531 --> 00:26:14.228
I was, it was, it was, it was like I was in a movie that was set for me.

00:26:14.228 --> 00:26:15.972
I was the popular guy.

00:26:15.972 --> 00:26:17.505
I was hanging out with the popular guys.

00:26:17.505 --> 00:26:18.429
I was going on dates.

00:26:18.429 --> 00:26:20.115
It was crazy to me.

00:26:20.115 --> 00:26:21.740
I had this totally different life.

00:26:22.182 --> 00:26:26.741
Now I'm on the plane ride home and I go oh my goodness, nobody at home knows I'm cool now.

00:26:26.741 --> 00:26:34.202
It was this hilarious realization and I was so blessed to have this kind of wisdom even at that age.

00:26:34.202 --> 00:26:35.906
I don't even know how I got this.

00:26:35.906 --> 00:26:38.401
I really feel like God instilled this in me to go.

00:26:38.401 --> 00:26:42.989
I'm going to have some conversations with some people to say, listen, I'm a different human being now.

00:26:42.989 --> 00:26:47.282
I would love if you came along with me in this next chapter of my life.

00:26:47.282 --> 00:26:56.833
I'm not expecting you to change, but I do expect you to welcome the new me and to encourage me becoming this better version of myself.

00:26:56.833 --> 00:27:03.286
And if you can't do that, hey, I'm not going to stop loving you, but you're probably going to be in my old chat.

00:27:03.286 --> 00:27:06.700
By the way, that does not refer to anybody who's married.

00:27:06.700 --> 00:27:09.707
Don't go saying Marcus told me to leave this person.

00:27:09.887 --> 00:27:15.607
I am uncomfortable with that, and there's something different for married people.

00:27:15.607 --> 00:27:21.951
I put that in the book as well, but I just those conversations are so valuable because you're going to see people's intentions real quick.

00:27:21.951 --> 00:27:24.636
What, how dare you speak like this to me?

00:27:24.636 --> 00:27:25.640
Go screw you, blah, blah.

00:27:25.640 --> 00:27:30.176
And it's like holy, I didn't expect you to like go off the rails like that.

00:27:30.176 --> 00:27:33.066
And then there's other people like, wow, I really appreciate it.

00:27:33.066 --> 00:27:34.509
Of course, I want the best for you.

00:27:34.509 --> 00:27:35.921
I'm there to support you.

00:27:35.921 --> 00:27:39.606
Wouldn't you love to hear those words from the people you care about?

00:27:39.606 --> 00:27:45.926
So why not have that conversation and let's see where where the cards fall.

00:27:47.901 --> 00:27:48.301
Love that.

00:27:48.301 --> 00:27:52.742
Marcus, I cannot believe how fast your time are going, but I still got a few questions.

00:27:52.742 --> 00:27:53.445
I'm going to keep going.

00:27:53.445 --> 00:28:03.248
One of the one of the I mean I'm just going to touch on all seven real quick the principles that Marcus talks about in his book integrity, choice, faith, service, gratitude, discipline, consistency.

00:28:03.248 --> 00:28:05.522
We did not have enough time to talk about all seven of those.

00:28:05.522 --> 00:28:07.328
Again, get the book.

00:28:07.328 --> 00:28:09.797
It's just come out recently.

00:28:09.797 --> 00:28:14.209
We'll talk about where to get it here in a second, but I wanted to like getting folks started.

00:28:14.209 --> 00:28:22.172
I'm going to make up that one of the disciplines that you do, that someone listening in could start right now to get going.

00:28:22.172 --> 00:28:26.065
You say in your book, sticky notes will change your life.

00:28:26.065 --> 00:28:28.171
How can sticky notes change my life?

00:28:29.121 --> 00:28:30.045
Oh, I love it.

00:28:30.045 --> 00:28:30.607
I love it.

00:28:30.607 --> 00:28:34.102
I knew that you would bring this one up too, since we were talking about sticky notes before.

00:28:34.102 --> 00:28:35.065
I think it's fantastic.

00:28:35.065 --> 00:28:37.570
Sticky notes really do change lives.

00:28:37.570 --> 00:28:41.066
Now you do have to know how to use them properly, and I know that sounds weird.

00:28:41.066 --> 00:28:42.809
It's like, doesn't it just stick on the back?

00:28:42.809 --> 00:28:43.873
Yeah, and that's not what I'm talking about.

00:28:45.320 --> 00:28:54.690
I love to choose three things that I really want to change about my life, and I'm going to write myself sticky notes to keep me on that path.

00:28:54.690 --> 00:28:56.053
And why I say three?

00:28:56.053 --> 00:29:09.310
Because we've all seen also people who take sticky notes too far and they've got a thousand sticky notes on their desk and that's just too much of a mess and that's too much chaos that I don't know if any one of those is actually going to make an impact.

00:29:09.310 --> 00:29:12.144
But if you take three things you're working on.

00:29:12.144 --> 00:29:15.492
So, for example, I want to be in a better mood.

00:29:15.492 --> 00:29:17.903
Okay, I feel like I'm a negative person.

00:29:17.903 --> 00:29:19.448
I'd love to have more energy.

00:29:19.448 --> 00:29:21.151
I'd like to be smiling more.

00:29:21.151 --> 00:29:22.233
I'd like to be more positive.

00:29:22.233 --> 00:29:28.019
What I'm going to do is I'm going to write positive quotes and positive affirmations.

00:29:28.019 --> 00:29:37.824
Now, I know that word has some funny connotations for some people, but it really just means, marcus, you're doing great, marcus, you're a great husband, marcus, you're a great father.

00:29:37.824 --> 00:29:38.647
You're doing it.

00:29:38.647 --> 00:29:41.741
How far do you want to go?

00:29:41.741 --> 00:29:43.468
And I'm going to put these sticky notes everywhere.

00:29:43.468 --> 00:29:48.772
I'm going to put them on my desk, I'm going to put them in my car, I'm going to put them on my bathroom mirror.

00:29:48.772 --> 00:29:53.403
You're going to put it so many places that you can't avoid it.

00:29:53.403 --> 00:29:55.487
And it keeps hitting you.

00:29:55.487 --> 00:29:58.570
And again, you see why I only choose three If there's too many.

00:29:58.631 --> 00:30:07.685
Now, now, sticky notes are everywhere and you're like ah, messages coming at me in all directions, but no, it's just the positivity, yes, and what you'll notice after a few days?

00:30:07.685 --> 00:30:09.471
You're like man, I'm already feeling it.

00:30:09.471 --> 00:30:26.286
I'm feeling a difference from having to read this over and over, like it's impacting me, and what ends up happening is you would actually have to work harder to avoid the sticky notes and to avoid the message, and to avoid the change and to just change.

00:30:26.286 --> 00:30:32.740
And that is what the key to success is when you can make things easier for yourself.

00:30:32.740 --> 00:30:34.644
See, we are creatures of comfort.

00:30:34.644 --> 00:30:37.250
It's easier and it's known.

00:30:37.751 --> 00:30:42.402
If I go sit on the couch for six hours and watch Netflix, I know what I'm going to expect.

00:30:42.402 --> 00:30:48.240
It's not going to be great programming, but hey, I'm going to be relaxed and six hours are going to go by.

00:30:48.240 --> 00:30:54.574
But if you create situations, for example extreme, put the couch in the garage.

00:30:54.574 --> 00:30:57.324
There's no couch for me to sit down on.

00:30:57.324 --> 00:30:59.849
What am I about to do with my six hours?

00:30:59.849 --> 00:31:04.166
You won't be sitting on the couch in your garage for six hours.

00:31:04.166 --> 00:31:05.009
Boom.

00:31:05.009 --> 00:31:07.173
Look how easily your life changed.

00:31:07.173 --> 00:31:14.534
So what we need to do is just create situations where it's easier to change than it is to stay the same.

00:31:16.599 --> 00:31:17.340
Really cool stuff.

00:31:17.340 --> 00:31:26.450
Now, regards to sticky notes, if you knew, if you watched me or those who know me are kind of chuckling because they would accuse me of being stockholder in 3M.

00:31:26.450 --> 00:31:31.153
All the sticky notes I use to help facilitate coaching sessions and consulting work.

00:31:31.153 --> 00:31:33.737
So they know that and they'll be laughing at me right now.

00:31:33.737 --> 00:31:36.443
John, do you mind if I put you on the spot for a second Go?

00:31:36.463 --> 00:31:36.663
ahead.

00:31:36.663 --> 00:31:38.409
Do you mind if I put you on the spot for a second?

00:31:38.750 --> 00:31:39.070
Go ahead.

00:31:43.920 --> 00:31:45.948
You've clearly done some phenomenal research on my book, which, by the way, I'm so grateful for.

00:31:45.948 --> 00:31:48.236
Just hearing you ask these very specific questions, man, I'm so grateful for that.

00:31:48.236 --> 00:31:52.750
Can I ask you, what's your number one takeaway from?

00:31:52.790 --> 00:31:54.266
the book, my number one takeaway thus far.

00:31:54.266 --> 00:32:09.990
Well, again, I appreciate as I listen through and by getting a chance to interview so many authors, as I listened through and by getting a chance to interview so many authors, it's the some of the things start to overlap with regards to some of the disciplines and activities.

00:32:09.990 --> 00:32:18.222
I mean, everybody would say, or at least I would hear people would say every leadership book is based on three books that have been written Think and Grow Rich, the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, and the.

00:32:18.222 --> 00:32:23.594
The Bible and all other books are written by words inside of those books.

00:32:25.121 --> 00:32:39.451
But what I truly see and what I read, and why I'm not surprised, is the energy that has gone into what has caused you to transform From that life of bullying so it's aligned with me to where you have had to transform.

00:32:39.451 --> 00:32:44.776
It's aligned with me to where you have had to transform, not just you know choosing at the age of 15, making that choice, but all the way through your journey.

00:32:44.776 --> 00:32:46.782
Now you know, through 20 years of marriage, through kids.

00:32:46.782 --> 00:32:51.541
So there's a, there's a level of energy that has to exist to carry it on for that long.

00:32:51.541 --> 00:33:01.271
So the longevity in which you've been able to do that gives credence to, to your point, the length of the chapter on discipline and the other story.

00:33:01.271 --> 00:33:08.403
So you're not just writing this because, uh, you've heard about it or read about it, you've lived it and I think that's a big difference.

00:33:08.403 --> 00:33:16.022
So and I'm not again I wasn't surprised by the energy level that you had coming into this, with the effort you've put into the book launch.

00:33:16.022 --> 00:33:17.163
So that's to me.

00:33:17.163 --> 00:33:19.664
If that's a takeaway for me, it's there, absolutely.

00:33:20.505 --> 00:33:21.066
Beautiful man.

00:33:21.066 --> 00:33:23.366
Hey, listen, I just want to say how much I appreciate that.

00:33:23.366 --> 00:33:30.490
It is a phenomenal takeaway, and you know famous Tony quote where focus goes, energy flows.

00:33:30.490 --> 00:33:40.837
My focus has been pretty clear on where I want to be, who I want to be in my life, and I'm just pouring 100% of myself into it every single day.

00:33:46.519 --> 00:33:46.700
Awesome.

00:33:46.700 --> 00:33:49.386
Now that may lead and maybe that was the answer that you want to hear or don't want to hear is the book test.

00:33:49.386 --> 00:33:59.949
I mean, you see my like I've got your book turned in every other book on my shelf and those of you watching on YouTube you can't see it, but I've got, you know, probably 150 books on my shelf that have the binders facing out.

00:33:59.949 --> 00:34:12.420
I've read most of the books that are on this shelf not every one of them, but most of the ones that are there, and so when I turn that book after I'm done reading it, marcus, and I put it on that shelf and I put it on the binder and I look at it a year later.

00:34:12.420 --> 00:34:18.250
What do you want me or the reader of your book to think about a year later after reading your book?

00:34:18.990 --> 00:34:21.856
Oh, wow, that's a really brilliant question.

00:34:21.856 --> 00:34:27.773
I mean there's a few ways I could answer this, but I am going to go with the giving it your all.

00:34:27.773 --> 00:34:31.628
So I'd love to give this one last actionable tip for everybody.

00:34:31.628 --> 00:34:38.768
I'd love for you to visualize for a moment the last time you were at 100% during your workday.

00:34:38.768 --> 00:34:40.811
I mean at 100% Like.

00:34:40.811 --> 00:34:42.614
You were in that flow state.

00:34:42.614 --> 00:34:45.965
You had the right energy, you had the right confidence.

00:34:45.965 --> 00:34:48.027