Transforming Lives Through Style: An Empowering Journey with Jessica Papineau

Transcript

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You never know what your limits are until you surpass them.

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I read that quote and it's just so.

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It's so true that we put these limiting beliefs on ourselves and think we can only go so far, but I think it's so important to continuously grow and learn, to live our best life and to really make that impact on the world.

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Hey Uncommon Leaders, welcome back.

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This is the Uncommon Leader Podcast and I'm your host, john Gallagher.

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Today I'm excited to have Jessica Papano, the inspiring founder of CSJ Styling, join me to share her remarkable journey on the Uncommon Leader Podcast.

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In this episode, jessica discusses the pivotal moment that drove her to dig deeper into her purpose, when she was listening to a Tony Robbins podcast, and how fashion became her vehicle for fostering leadership and confidence.

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We'll dive into her approach to personal styling, focusing not just on physical appearance but also on mindset shifts that account for 75% of the transformation.

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Join me as Jessica reveals how to surpass limits and live your best life.

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Let's get started.

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Jessica Pavanel, welcome to the Uncommon Leader podcast.

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It's great to have you on the show.

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How are you doing today?

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I'm great, John.

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Thank you so much for having me.

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I am just so excited to be here with you today.

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Good Well, I know that the listeners are going to learn a lot from you, as we had some conversation before we hit the record button.

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I always miss those.

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I always think I should just have the record button on anyway, because there's a great conversation, but I think you got a great story to share with the folks and looking forward to it.

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But I'm going to start you off with the first question that I start every first time guest with on the Uncommon Leader podcast, and that's to ask you to tell me a story from your childhood that still impacts who you are today as a person and as a leader.

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I have so many amazing stories, john, but I'm going to tell you one specific one that it really drives me every day.

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Actually, it's something that I recall and remember every day, and that is so.

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When I was growing up, I lived in the backwoods of Maine, like off the grid my parents, you know they had.

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We had no electricity, we had no running water, we had an outhouse.

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I mean, it was bare bones and but my love of fashion really was from a very young age, and so I mean I truly believe that when we're born with you know some kind of greatness within us, our uniqueness, whatever you, you know, you want to call it what God, our God, given, you know, gift.

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I loved fashion.

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Now, my parents were not super approving of me loving fashion In fact, all my clothes came from Salvation Army but I would spend from the time I was about four years old and I would go in my closet every day and take out all the Salvation Army clothes and put on the outfits and look in the mirror and create these outfits and feel.

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I remember feeling beautiful.

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It was like inclusive and I was having fun and it was just the way that I played, and but I would leave the clothes on the floor in the closet.

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By the end of the day it had piled up.

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And so I'll never forget the day that my dad came in with a padlock and he went to put the padlock on the door of my closet and I remember what that felt like.

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I remember thinking that my love of fashion and what you know, the beauty and all of that, I thought, well, I guess it's not important and it's, maybe it's superficial, and you know my parents don't approve of it and I not.

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That it was unintentional, I'm sure on his part, you know he's just trying to do the right thing as a dad, but it made me feel like what I loved wasn't important.

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And so I think that was, you know, the first time I experienced the keep quiet.

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You know, don't, do, you know, do what others want you to do, that kind of thing.

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And so I remember that every day when I'm serving other women and helping them to truly step into their power, and you know it's about exploiting your uniqueness and that's how, in this world, I truly believe we're able to serve in the best possible way.

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Whatever our gifts are is what we're truly meant to do to make impact.

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Absolutely the stories that we have from our past.

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So we impact what we're passionate about, what we're good at and what folks need in the future.

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And so you're the founder of CSJ Styling.

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You get a chance, since you did that as a child.

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Now you do that as an adult.

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You kind of play in the closet, if you will as well, helping women to learn that stage of design.

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And I won't say it correctly, so I'm going to let you say it correctly, but ultimately serve them in your role.

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Before you started CSJ, was there a moment where you really made the decision that that's what you wanted to do as a career Was help individuals like that?

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Yes, absolutely, um, and I remember it's.

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You know, I think transformations and decisions really happen in moments.

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You know we can, you know, throw ideas around and you know I remember, you know, driving to work.

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Um, when I was, I was working as a sales manager, a local boutique, high-end clothing boutique and med spa.

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And you know, on my way to work, I would, you know, listen to my motivational podcasts.

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I listened to Tony Robbins mostly at that time and you know, I felt like there was like this tap on the shoulder or this whisper in my ear like there's something more.

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There's something more you were meant for, more than what you're doing now.

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And and I had at that time, I had already helped women to transform, many women to transform their lives, just through them, you know, coming to me and me helping them to feel beautiful in clothing and really align what they were wearing with the life they desired, in fact, it was my side hustle, where I would go and go to their homes and help them curate their wardrobes and pack for their trips and all kinds of fun stuff.

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But I had seen these transformations and seen how these women's lives were better because I had helped them to feel beautiful, their relationships were improving and they were becoming more successful in their businesses.

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And I had, you know, I really went back actually to my childhood and thought about what my superpower was, and it really was my imagination, and so I have this ability to imagine a better life for other women and hold space with them, to have them imagine a better life for themselves.

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And so I had this idea that I knew that I had to create something bigger than me and Tony Robbins.

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I was at a stoplight and I heard Tony Robbins say if you have a gift and you know you have this gift to share, but you choose not to share it, it's selfish, right, you're being selfish, but and you know many of us were scared to try new things, and that's all a part of it is fear, right, but to do it anyway and have the courage to do it anyway and have the courage to do it anyway to make those impacts.

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And when I heard him say it, I could not unhear it and I certainly couldn't unknow what I knew, which was that I could do something bigger and make a deeper impact.

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That's when the decision was made.

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How cool is, is that?

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So you look at what you quote, do and I and I hear really two things.

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One is I mean you help women to go through their closets and get things to match better.

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That's again my bad words with it.

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But there's a second piece of that that impacts their confidence, their mindset and you and their ability, frankly, to step into a leadership role.

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And I don't mean leadership just from the position of a manager or a title that they have, but a leadership role as an influencer in their lives, as a better spouse, as a better parent and as a better leader in their communities and in their businesses as well.

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And so how can style, something as simple as style, be able to impact their confidence and mindset to make them better leaders?

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This is going to sound really strange.

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I'm really helping them to, in a way, get over themselves.

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So when women look in the mirror and it doesn't matter this is my experience anyway it doesn't matter what age she is, what size she is or what season of life she's in Typically, what women do especially when they have unfitted clothing when they look in the mirror, their eye goes right to the area or areas of their body that they either really don't like or that they're shameful of, and so this kind of goes to mindset.

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So what happens?

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When you look at yourself and you see things you don't like or you feel shameful about certain things, you just get more of that Right, certain things.

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You just get more of that right, and it becomes these self-limiting beliefs, these negative thoughts, negative ideas we have about ourselves and we can't get past it.

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So the woman that I really serve in the deepest way, she really is the high-performing woman.

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She really is the woman that desires to be the best version of herself in every area.

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When she's you know, when she is at home, she wants to hold the space with her kids and really be the best version of herself in every area.

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When she is at home.

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She wants to hold the space with her kids and really be the best mom she can and go to all their different events.

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And with her husband she wants to do date night and really hold the space with him, deepen the relationship In business.

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She wants to continuously grow and learn and she's not afraid of fear.

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She is courageous and will try new things and grow.

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But she still has these self-limiting beliefs and there's a push right.

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There's a push with that of what she should be doing or how she feels she can continue to be successful.

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But when I help women look in the mirror and by using the right fit and the right fabric of clothing and showing them not how to hide the areas that they don't love about themselves but to highlight their best features, how to utilize clothing to enhance, skim the body and show the best parts of the body, so that she can look at herself in the mirror and literally go from focusing on what she doesn't like and she can begin to see her whole body and really feel beautiful.

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And when a woman truly feels beautiful is when she can look in her own eyes and much like I did when I was looking in the mirror, you know, pretending I was at all these parties and feeling great about myself.

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She can look in her own eyes and know and be okay with her uniqueness and know that she is ready to share her gifts with the world, and that's when she can truly step into her power and go out there and share what she was born to share.

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Jessica.

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I love that as I listened through.

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There's so many things that so many avenues I want to go down, but a picture that came to my mind was this term of these four overlapping circles Japanese term, ikigai.

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In terms of understanding, is there something that I'm good at, that I'm passionate about, that?

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It fills a need.

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But the fourth overlapping circle is that I'm also fulfilled from it.

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You're living out your purpose, you're being fulfilled in your work and I guess, since there's a couple of things, one is that because of your past, even as that four-year-old child in the closet, you're able to help yourself because you once went through similar things in terms of going forward.

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So tell me about that a little bit.

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Is that a little bit of what drove you?

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Roy Vaden would say you're most powerfully positioned to help the person that you used to be.

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Was that where you were as you went through that journey?

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You know part of the story from your dad, but other other times as well.

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This has been such a journey for me and really, um, you know, not only with the business, but a self-discovery and realizing that through line between you know what.

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You know what I really, what I have to offer, what I see.

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You know the beauty that I see in other women.

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You know, and also the, the fashion piece and how I do that.

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I would say, even when I started my company and that was five years ago February 14 of 2019 is when we launched but I still, at that time, was not in complete alignment myself with what it was that I was doing.

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I still had those feelings of that.

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It was slightly superficial.

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The love of the fashion and the beauty superficial.

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The love of the fashion and the beauty.

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It really it's now seeing, over the course of the last five years of doing this, with thousands of women, watching them go through this process, of realizing that the clothing and the fashion and the beauty, that's just the vehicle.

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That was just what God gave me to use right to help women step into their power, and so I don't know if I answered your question, but it's just been.

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It's allowing me to help women in an even deeper way, but it's also helping me help those women that are who I once was you know, and helping them to to exploit their uniqueness.

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Really, they've tried to hide their uniqueness because they have shame around it, but once I can show them how to exploit that uniqueness in the service of others much like.

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Rory Vaden, you know, has said you know it really, that's my why, that's what drives me and keeps me keeps me going, yeah.

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No, I appreciate that because what I can sense within that passion is that it doesn't get boring for you.

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To a certain extent, I just make things up like chefs cook so many meals for others that they don't want to cook meals for themselves when they get home.

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Or even some folks say, well, you fly on an airplane a lot.

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You must get a lot of free miles so you can fly anywhere you want to.

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I'm like, yeah, but at some point I don't want to fly on airplanes because I fly on airplanes too much.

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I'd rather just stay home.

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I get a sense that as you help others, you still have that same passion in doing that for yourself as well.

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And they are always going through to make sure that your confidence continues to grow.

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And I am curious.

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So I'm going to have some fun with some accessorizing and things at the end, because, again, the questions that I don't ask very well, but you know, experts have to stay experts in their craft.

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So what are some habits and disciplines you have to stay up with?

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What's going on currently in your craft, in your industry that you work in?

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I've really niched in, john, on um, on the woman that I serve most deeply, and I do.

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I definitely do keep up with what's happening.

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In fact, you know, fashion week every year, going to New York scouting new lines, seeing what these different trends and things are that are out there.

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Certainly very important.

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However, the way that I run my business is very unique in that it's not about what's necessarily happening in fashion all around us, because I think this is where the confusion lies, with many women looking exterior for what should my style be?

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And a comparison thing.

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That happens when they look on social media, when they look on Pinterest, when they see people you know posting stories about how perfect their lives are and how they look in their fashion, you know, and then you know the whole like, click and buy.

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When you know the women at night are looking and saying, oh, I want to look as beautiful as this.

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Getting the item in looking and saying, oh, I want to look as beautiful as this.

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Getting the item in trying it on and it not fitting and looking the way it did on someone else, and then that feeling like a reflection of, wow, there's something wrong with me and so what?

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I really am focused on, john, when it comes to styling and fashion, is really what I've formulated over the years, which is understanding that fit and fabric is everything, that the core wardrobe is everything.

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So many women now you know this whole thing in the fashion industry about the capsule wardrobe.

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I've really been doing the capsule wardrobe since the 90s.

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We just didn't, I just didn't call it that, I didn't, I didn't really have a name then but really ensuring that the pieces that I'm getting for my clients are pieces that look amazing on their body, they have a core foundation of items that they feel great in, that align not only with their current lifestyle but with the lifestyle they desire.

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And then utilizing and creating and having inspiration from what is happening in the fashion world and that really being the icing on the cake and how they round out, how I teach women how to round out the outfits, and so when I go to New York and I do my buying, it's very interesting because I buy differently than stores and boutiques buy.

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I'm delving into more of what those core basics are that have great fit and great fabric and then sprinkling in what these trends are.

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I know I went deep into that answer, but Well, it might be further again that certainly that I would go, but it's important.

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So it's the, it's the core pieces, and then you, you tie it around.

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So what are?

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Some of the fun questions for me are like what is it really about, then?

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That finishes it off?

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Is it the?

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Is it the earrings?

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Is it the jewelry?

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Is it the shoes?

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What is it that finishes it off?

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That that touch that's there.

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All right.

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So the core pieces really are like.

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You know the, the fitted black pant and the perfect you know black blouse and say that's like your core, I call it the cake, and then we will put some novelty on with that.

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We'll put on a fun jacket, right?

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You know a great blazer that maybe is tweed or it has some interesting details.

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It's all about details.

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So when you say earrings and shoes and it's all of those little things, so it doesn't have to be you know some big thing, but it really is all about the details.

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It's about really being intentional about those details.

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So even if on a casual day you put on, you know, a pair of jeans and a white t-shirt, put on a really nice belt, that's quality, that's something that you'll have for a long time and it can be the same.

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You know cognac colored belt that you wear pretty regularly.

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You don't have to have multiples of them, but you know something that really makes that statement some great earrings, a necklace and putting on you know, really nice shoes.

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That's really what rounds out the outfit and creates, you know, that visual interest that we want to see in an outfit.

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All right, we talked about this in our prep call, that you need to do this for guys as well, because I'll be there.

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I think it's something I do work with some men and they're the basically the husbands or significant others of the women that I work with.

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I do work with some of the some of them, but not listening as well?

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Why do men need to be more empathetic to this process that you're, that you're taking women through?

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process that you're taking women through.

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I think that you know it really has a lot to do with you know, when a man wants and men want to have connections with their significant other, right, they want to have, they want their wife to hold the space with them, they want to go on date night, you know.

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But when she is not feeling great about how she looks or she feels like she doesn't have an outfit to wear that makes her feel beautiful when they go to dinner, she's going to opt out of going for dinner and that's going to really affect him.

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Right, that's going to, it's going to kind of derail the ability to spend that quality time together.

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But I think sometimes what men think and typically when I begin working with a woman, the husband looks a little, seems a little unsure because he just sees his wife going out there and spending more money on clothes and she has a closet full of clothes and she's saying she has nothing to wear.

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But sometimes what men don't understand, they think they don't realize that it's not how others perceive us, it's how we perceive ourselves.

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So when she feels beautiful and feels amazing about how she looks, that's going to allow her to connect deeper with her significant other, and so he needs to be mindful of that.

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But he doesn't necessarily understand because he's just seeing her make the same mistakes and bye, bye, bye, over and over again.

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Hey listeners, I want to take a quick moment to share something special with you.

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Many of the topics and discussions we have on this podcast are areas where I provide coaching and consulting services for individuals and organizations.

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If you've been inspired by our conversation and are seeking a catalyst for change in your own life or within your team, I invite you to visit coachjohngallaghercom.

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Forward slash free call to sign up for a free coaching call with me.

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It's an opportunity for us to connect, discuss your unique challenges and explore how coaching or consulting can benefit you and your team.

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Okay, let's get back to the show.

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Rewind that last 30 seconds.

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Guys, pay attention.

00:22:48.800 --> 00:22:52.171
You mentioned you've had a chance to work with hundreds of women, maybe more.

00:22:52.171 --> 00:23:02.392
Do you have a specific or this might be an unfair question, I'll ask it anyway a specific transformative client story that just resonates with you that you're able to share?

00:23:03.559 --> 00:23:04.402
God again.

00:23:04.402 --> 00:23:12.143
I have so many, but I'll share one that I really enjoy sharing because she reminds me of me.

00:23:12.143 --> 00:23:13.125
I guess I would say.

00:23:13.125 --> 00:23:26.924
So let's call her Jennifer, because I can't I'm not, I won't use her real name, but Jennifer reached out to me about a year and a half ago and she had a.

00:23:26.924 --> 00:23:28.426
She was desperate.

00:23:28.426 --> 00:23:39.490
She was going for the very first time to meet not only at the higher ups in her IT company she was working for, but her team that actually worked under her.

00:23:39.490 --> 00:23:41.864
She was going to meet them in person for the first time.

00:23:42.505 --> 00:23:58.503
Her position was a virtual position and she was at a mid-level position with a sales team under her, and she had had a baby six months prior and really had not lost the baby weight yet, hadn't invested in herself.

00:23:58.503 --> 00:24:02.471
She felt good enough when she would go on her Zoom call.

00:24:02.471 --> 00:24:06.406
So like from the waist up she, you know, kind of had it going on.

00:24:06.406 --> 00:24:19.530
She had the earrings and hair done and you know a top, but on the bottom, you know really sweatpants, right, and so she was really concerned about how she was going to show up on this trip and she had no clothes.

00:24:19.530 --> 00:24:26.454
She was desperate and so went to help her wield in two racks of clothes.

00:24:26.454 --> 00:24:35.124
And I mean, this girl thought I'm never going to fit in a pair of jeans again, let alone, you know, put on a blazer and walk in a room and feel great.

00:24:35.124 --> 00:24:42.023
And so you know, her body language when we first arrived was, you know, shoulders rolled in.

00:24:42.023 --> 00:24:48.461
She already looked defeated and was like I just have to get this, I just need a couple outfits Right.

00:24:48.461 --> 00:25:04.416
And so by the end of the appointment we had fully packed her for this trip with day to night, even her plain outfit, so that when she walked into the hotel where the seminar was being held she actually looked put together.

00:25:04.416 --> 00:25:27.141
We left her.

00:25:27.141 --> 00:25:28.605
She felt wonderful, she was just going to pack for her trip.

00:25:28.625 --> 00:25:31.131
She reached out to me three weeks later and said Jessica, I've worn everything, I'm going on another business trip.

00:25:31.131 --> 00:25:31.913
I need you to come back, so I go back.

00:25:31.913 --> 00:25:33.376
And I said, jennifer, before we begin, you have could have imagined.

00:25:33.376 --> 00:25:35.701
She said I just called you to find me a couple outfits.

00:25:35.701 --> 00:25:52.593
And she said but what happened was, when I walked into the hotel where the seminar was being held, she said I just like, I felt like I wanted to be seen, whereas in the past, you know, I just figured I wanted to blend in with the crowd.

00:25:52.593 --> 00:26:03.363
She said when I walked into the first meeting that we had, the vice president of the company walked up to me and she said, introduced herself.

00:26:03.363 --> 00:26:07.030
And she said and your name is and what position are you in?

00:26:07.030 --> 00:26:10.685
And she said it was so interesting because we had met on Zoom many times.

00:26:10.685 --> 00:26:14.834
And so she said oh wow, I'm sorry I did.

00:26:14.834 --> 00:26:17.164
I guess I knew you, but I didn't recognize you.

00:26:17.164 --> 00:26:20.873
She said you look like you could own this company.

00:26:20.873 --> 00:26:26.008
And she said she couldn't even believe.

00:26:26.229 --> 00:26:36.625
At every different point in the weekend, even when they had their lunches and dinners and things, the higher-ups of the company were asking her to sit at their table.

00:26:36.625 --> 00:26:41.382
They were asking her opinion on how they could make the company better.

00:26:41.382 --> 00:27:02.867
She said, and I actually was hearing myself answer these questions and knowing how skilled I was, and in the past I wouldn't have shared those things even like how skilled I was, and in the past I wouldn't have shared those things even she said at the end of the weekend the vice president came up to me again and she said when you get home we need to schedule a Zoom call.

00:27:02.867 --> 00:27:15.400
I realized after this weekend that the way that you present yourself and the skillset you have is way beyond what we have you doing now, and the skill set you have is way beyond what we have you doing now.

00:27:15.400 --> 00:27:20.653
In fact, it completely aligns with our brand as a company and what we want to represent with our clients.

00:27:20.653 --> 00:27:22.527
We need you in front of the clients.

00:27:23.760 --> 00:27:26.028
And she said so I'm going.

00:27:26.028 --> 00:27:36.703
She was going to another company meeting, but it was because she had gotten a promotion and so she had actually taken the time in a desperate way to invest in herself.

00:27:36.703 --> 00:27:42.320
But in doing so, she actually created more abundance in her life.

00:27:42.320 --> 00:27:48.195
She was happier, she felt beautiful and she became more successful.

00:27:48.195 --> 00:27:53.049
And she said I never thought that I thought I had reached the top.

00:27:53.049 --> 00:27:54.846
I thought I had gone as far as I could go.

00:27:54.846 --> 00:28:07.713
I was happy with the job I had, and when she started to feel amazing about herself, she stepped into this whole new level and became something that she never thought was possible.

00:28:09.375 --> 00:28:11.876
Hmm, that's crazy, that's awesome.

00:28:11.876 --> 00:28:21.324
Actually, as I listened through that story and you talked about the uh, a couple of things for folks to think about, here's a quote from something you had sent me.

00:28:21.324 --> 00:28:23.766
In the world of leadership, first impressions matter.

00:28:23.766 --> 00:28:30.210
As high level performers, we understand the significance of presenting ourselves in the best possible light.

00:28:30.210 --> 00:28:32.511
Yet and you started come, you get the.

00:28:32.511 --> 00:28:35.719
Yet it's not just about attire or impression.

00:28:35.719 --> 00:28:39.428
It's about the confidence and empowerment that comes from feeling good.

00:28:39.428 --> 00:28:49.195
So there's really again your uh trade, your craft uh is about crafting a look, but it's not really about a look.

00:28:49.195 --> 00:28:56.981
I think it feels more about the mindset, the confidence and I'll go as far as to say the worthiness that that individual has.

00:28:56.981 --> 00:29:15.878
That by giving them confidence through that, would you say that the percentage feels like 25% closed and 75% mindset You're shifting their mindset away from the negative thoughts, those things that they look at that may not be as attractive, and shifting them to the positive thoughts.

00:29:16.980 --> 00:29:18.324
Absolutely it's.

00:29:18.324 --> 00:29:19.948
It's way more than clothes.

00:29:22.556 --> 00:29:23.297
Absolutely it's.

00:29:23.297 --> 00:29:38.150
It's just, it's not about the clothes, it's about the self-confidence that that you're able to give them through your guidance, and I sense that you have a way with them to get them to feel better about themselves before they leave.

00:29:38.150 --> 00:29:47.509
What are some actionable steps and practical steps for someone to take to improve their personal style and image?

00:29:47.509 --> 00:29:49.020
Like practical, what can they do tomorrow?

00:29:50.496 --> 00:29:54.464
There's a couple of things, but you know the the first.

00:29:54.464 --> 00:30:09.998
I'll just share with you the first part of my framework that I that I walk my clients through, because this will this will give you, give your the people listening and watching some, just some really easy things that they can do now.

00:30:09.998 --> 00:30:13.605
The first step really has nothing to do with the clothes.

00:30:13.605 --> 00:30:20.944
The first step is really being curious about what the future looks like.

00:30:20.944 --> 00:30:24.538
It's really being curious about, you know, what do you really desire?

00:30:24.538 --> 00:30:28.007
Where do you see yourself in the coming years?

00:30:28.007 --> 00:30:30.358
Where do you want to see yourself in the coming years?

00:30:30.358 --> 00:30:41.276
And then taking that moment to close your eyes and really imagine yourself there and what does it look like, what does it feel like and what do you look like.

00:30:41.276 --> 00:30:56.470
And then, with that lens of curiosity and imagination, walking into the wardrobe and really determining what pieces that are in there align with that image.

00:30:56.470 --> 00:31:07.190
What pieces, you know, do you feel that you're worthy of putting yourself into and feeling great in.

00:31:07.190 --> 00:31:16.679
And you know and thinking about, even if it's a Monday, putting on your best dress right and feeling great because you deserve to feel that way.

00:31:16.679 --> 00:31:21.368
And then the other piece of that is really determining.

00:31:21.368 --> 00:31:33.586
You know, obviously what pieces are not working for you, and letting go of the past, because you know, as the high performer that I serve, you know we're not looking behind us.

00:31:33.586 --> 00:31:37.558
We're really not going that way, so why stay there?

00:31:37.659 --> 00:31:43.999
You know, clothes hold us back, those clothes that don't fit us or that we wore in our previous life.

00:31:43.999 --> 00:32:14.262
They hold us back from what we desire and so, really taking the opportunity to let go of what's no longer serving us and feel worthy of going out there and getting the pieces that align and that do make us feel worthy I do have on my website, john, it's my free wardrobe edit blueprint and these are like some really amazing actionable steps that'll kind of get this process started.

00:32:14.262 --> 00:32:20.701
And you know there's I call it, the three F's fit, fabric, fashion.

00:32:20.701 --> 00:32:27.803
And then, does the item that you're looking at really align with lifestyle or where you're headed in your life?

00:32:27.803 --> 00:32:29.988
And they're very simple.

00:32:29.988 --> 00:32:33.239
You know questions that you ask yourself of.

00:32:33.239 --> 00:32:38.105
You know if it, and if the answer is no, the item is no, get rid of it.

00:32:38.105 --> 00:32:39.626
You know, move on.

00:32:39.647 --> 00:32:42.957
Wow, Wait.

00:32:42.957 --> 00:32:44.001
So the answer is no.

00:32:44.001 --> 00:32:45.480
Get rid of the item.

00:32:45.820 --> 00:32:48.718
Get rid of the item and maybe it's, you know.

00:32:48.718 --> 00:32:57.398
Perhaps it's you're consigning it, you know, and you're getting a little bit of money towards investing in a new wardrobe.

00:32:57.398 --> 00:33:23.784
Maybe it's donating it and you're donating it to someone that's maybe stepping into a new life as well that was like your previous life and you're giving, you're giving back to that person and paying it forward has no, it's not serving anybody just sitting there in your closet, or it's not doing anyone any good for you to be putting that on your body and feeling just good enough, because you're worthy of more than that.

00:33:25.248 --> 00:33:26.431
So, so powerful.

00:33:26.431 --> 00:33:34.169
You know it's simple again it's outside of just wardrobe, but it really is sorting out those things that no longer serve you.

00:33:34.169 --> 00:33:46.968
And again, there was a conversation I read about when we stay in our past, especially, and if some of those things bring back some negative connotation, it's just got to go.

00:33:46.968 --> 00:33:48.240
We got to sort those things out.

00:33:48.240 --> 00:33:54.895
We got to move them out of our mindset, because they stay there and remind us of things that we don't need to know about.

00:33:54.895 --> 00:34:01.259
I'll make sure to get a link to that to your website so that folks can go and get that free wardrobe imprint.

00:34:01.259 --> 00:34:02.625
I think that's a great idea.

00:34:03.186 --> 00:34:05.074
Can I add one thing, John you?

00:34:05.134 --> 00:34:05.414
can.

00:34:05.414 --> 00:34:09.097
You can add it's just about you the reason why.

00:34:09.978 --> 00:34:16.400
I just know, I know how, how this process goes for women and it's really actually scary.

00:34:16.400 --> 00:34:19.382
It's scary to face these things.

00:34:19.382 --> 00:34:24.385
It's scary to think about what we really desire, because there's a lot of fear around.

00:34:24.385 --> 00:34:26.027
That, you know, and there's.

00:34:26.027 --> 00:34:44.974
The fear has to do with you know, trying something new, feeling worthy of of you know, stepping into our power, feeling worthy of you know, stepping into our power, but also, you know that overwhelm of like how do I know?

00:34:44.974 --> 00:34:45.856
Like just beginning that process.

00:34:45.876 --> 00:34:55.297
And it's okay to feel that way, because once you start feeling better and you start to like wear things that do align with this life you desire to step into, you need to know that the fear isn't going to go away.

00:34:55.297 --> 00:35:13.295
You just have to continuously lean into it and continue to be curious because, along with, you're going to experience a ton of joy because you're going to be feeling better about yourself, your relationships are going to deepen, you're going to be more successful.

00:35:13.295 --> 00:35:15.601
Feeling better about yourself, your relationships are going to deepen, you're going to be more successful.

00:35:15.601 --> 00:35:24.385
But in doing that, you're also going to be putting yourself out there to be seen, and being seen can be really scary, you know, being seen.

00:35:24.385 --> 00:35:28.744
We can get our butts kicked when we're seen, but that's part of feeling joy.

00:35:28.744 --> 00:35:35.445
So I just want people to know that if they're going to start the process yes, it's scary, but just keep going.

00:35:36.155 --> 00:35:38.204
Yeah, you're saying it's simple, it really is.

00:35:38.815 --> 00:35:42.005
I mean but it's not easy to go through in terms of those steps.

00:35:42.005 --> 00:35:44.740
To get started, I got the same feeling.

00:35:44.740 --> 00:35:48.346
I got T-shirts that I've had for 15 years that I'm just not getting rid of.

00:35:48.346 --> 00:35:50.021
I mean, they're just sitting there, right.

00:35:50.021 --> 00:35:51.097
That's part of the gastro.

00:35:51.097 --> 00:36:02.085
They have fears of throwing those things away, those memories away that still exist and hang on to things way too long, and that's probably unfair to just say that for guys.

00:36:02.155 --> 00:36:20.748
I think we all do, because I think about that in terms of relationships, facebook and people that you used to know that are on Facebook, that for some reason, we still have this desire to hold onto that rather than letting that go and moving into the future.

00:36:20.748 --> 00:36:39.668
So I'd love the thought process you have about focusing on what you want to feel like, or where you are in the future, and what you want to feel like when you're there, looking forward as you think about what that wardrobe and again, there's so many other things that run parallel to that in terms of mindset and our lives that are very important.

00:36:39.668 --> 00:36:42.521
Jessica, you've been so gracious with your time.

00:36:42.521 --> 00:36:47.340
I think I could keep going and I know I've already overrun the time that I had asked of you.

00:36:47.340 --> 00:36:51.496
How can folks stay in touch with you, get to know more about you.

00:36:52.798 --> 00:36:56.507
Well, definitely go on my website and download the free wardrobe edit blueprint.

00:36:56.507 --> 00:37:28.103
We also I'm also offering offering to your listeners and those that are watching today a freestyling call with me, and I'll also make sure you have that link, john, and really the purposes of that call are to really determine you know where you're at and your and your journey and your life in your life, but also as far as fashion and what your end game is, what your goals are with your wardrobe and really determining where I can meet you, where you are and see where the best place is to go for you.

00:37:28.103 --> 00:37:49.039
We're going to be launching an app here in the next little bit so I don't know when we're going live, but it might even be live by the time this podcast goes live where we'll have basically a three-tiered membership program, a digital course where people can learn how to do this on their own.

00:37:49.039 --> 00:38:03.969
Also a community where we'll basically do it with you, and group coaching on fashion and style, and then the one-on-one one-on-one working with me to curate a wardrobe specifically for you.

00:38:04.976 --> 00:38:15.527
Follow me on social media, for sure at the Jessica Papineau on Instagram, customized Styling by Jessica on Facebook, and just follow along on the journey.

00:38:15.527 --> 00:38:16.677
I have lots to offer.

00:38:16.677 --> 00:38:21.407
I try really hard to give lots of value on my social media platforms.

00:38:21.407 --> 00:38:24.159
And, yeah, just follow me on my journey.

00:38:25.141 --> 00:38:30.476
Excellent, so cool, great and great idea to give that away as part of it.

00:38:30.476 --> 00:38:33.384
I hope folks take advantage of it for you Again.

00:38:33.384 --> 00:38:35.501
Thank you for the time I've got to give you one more question.

00:38:35.501 --> 00:38:36.880
It's the last one I finished with.

00:38:36.880 --> 00:38:39.704
It gives you a chance to have the last word on the podcast.

00:38:39.704 --> 00:38:42.784
It's one I ask all my first time guests, but I'm going to give you a billboard.

00:38:42.784 --> 00:38:44.360
You can put it anywhere you want to.

00:38:44.360 --> 00:38:48.701
You can put it in Florida, you can put it in big city.

00:38:48.701 --> 00:38:53.307
What's the message that you would put on that billboard and why would you put that message on there?

00:39:01.516 --> 00:39:10.418
You never know what your limits are until you surpass them, and I think that that is quoted from someone I'm not quite sure who it is, but I read that quote and it's just so.

00:39:10.418 --> 00:39:29.782
It's so true that we put these limiting beliefs on ourselves and think we can only go so far, but I think it's so important to continuously grow and learn, to live our best life and to really make that impact on the world.

00:39:31.045 --> 00:39:33.262
Very cool, Jessica, thank you so much for sharing.

00:39:33.262 --> 00:39:39.326
I wish you the best in your future endeavors and thank you for sharing with the listeners the Uncommon Leader podcast.

00:39:40.114 --> 00:39:42.143
Thank you so much for having me, John.

00:39:45.255 --> 00:39:48.023
And that wraps up another episode of the Uncommon Leader podcast.

00:39:48.023 --> 00:39:49.166
Thanks for tuning in today.

00:39:49.166 --> 00:39:56.644
If you found value in this episode, I encourage you to share it with your friends, colleagues or anyone else who could benefit from the insights and inspiration we've shared.

00:39:56.644 --> 00:40:03.280
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00:40:03.280 --> 00:40:11.137
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00:40:11.137 --> 00:40:14.266
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