Turning Setbacks into Success: Amy Chambers on Resilience, Confidence, and Leadership

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That changed everything for me.

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It put me in a much more strategic position, much more proactive position.

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When people would ask me, hey, do you have time for this?

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I would be able to communicate from a position of strength and power and say I'd love to, but unfortunately I'm just not able to because I've actually got something I've deemed more important that is in the way of that and I've got to stay true to that.

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That's probably the number one thing that that's probably the number one thing.

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Hey, uncommon Leaders, welcome back.

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This is the Uncommon Leader Podcast.

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I'm your host, john Gallagher.

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I've got a great guest with me today who's going to lead us through a fantastic conversation her personal growth journey and how she supported others as an executive coach and as a leader in an organization as well.

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Amy Chambers she's got over 21 years of financial services industry and 15 in leadership roles.

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So by the age of 28, she was leading over 250 people in her organization, which says a lot about her leadership skill right off the bat and how that was recognized.

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But she's not just about those numbers.

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She's also a two-time international bestselling author.

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We'll talk about one of those books today during our conversation that came out in 2024.

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And we'll also talk about her journey of health and fitness and life in that.

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Let's give her some more numbers.

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She went from being unable to run a mile to completing over 240 half marathons and 12 full marathons, logging over 14,000 miles.

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I can't wait to hear how that even got started, when you didn't run a mile and then you turned into that many as well, as she's overcome a significant fear of skiing to become an avid skier and many other things that she's a part of, but I can't wait to hear what Amy has to say with us today.

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Amy Chambers, welcome to the Uncommon Leader podcast.

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How are you doing?

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I'm doing wonderful.

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Thanks so much for having me.

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John Can't wait.

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Absolutely.

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Well, let's jump right in.

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I'll give you the first question I always give every first-time guest on the podcast, and that's to ask you to tell us a story from your childhood that still impacts who you are today, as a person or as a leader.

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Great.

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I just thought of this in the last second since you've asked me.

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I remember being 13 years old and I wanted to try out for the high school basketball team, got rejected and came home kind of sad about it, crying a little bit, but within a few days resolved myself to practice and try again.

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And my parents basically forbade it.

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They said it's obvious, you're not a basketball player, let's focus on your studies.

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You have real talent there.

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It's just basketball must not be for you.

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And I accepted that and I think they meant well.

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They didn't want me to hurt or have pain.

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But I look back now with more experience and I realize that we were trying to avoid being uncomfortable and we had what I like to call a fixed mindset.

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We thought mistakes and failures were bad and they sort of stuck with us and we had this belief either you were born with it and it came naturally to you, or you didn't.

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We did not believe that things could be improved with hard work and effort.

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And I look back with a lot of regret because I loved basketball and I wasn't very good at it and so I didn't make the team.

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But I figured out within a few years of that having happened that something had gone wrong there, and I resolved myself to choose to feel differently when I didn't make the team, or it wasn't easy in the beginning, hence the running, hence the skiing.

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Now, and whenever something is making me feel awkward or uncomfortable, I've made this decision, this conscious choice, to just say, well, I just haven't worked hard enough at it yet, or it's a sign that I'm still growing or evolving.

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That's why it's so hard.

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I just need more practice.

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And I've decided not to use that kind of lesson that we had at the time, which is oh, it just must not be for you, let's try something else.

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And my parents meant, well, they loved me very much, but I think we avoided a lot of pain and a lot of hurt, and then that led us to kind of keeping ourselves smaller than we needed to be.

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So I still remember that basketball moment and say I never want to feel that way again.

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I never want to feel like it isn't for me or I should give up, just because it's not easy in the beginning.

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And so I've used that a lot in my adult life to kind of learn what not to do, honestly.

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When I think about that and I love that.

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That shaped you.

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Now the fact is, it still sits there.

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There's nothing you can do to change that past as well.

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Fixed mindset is one thing.

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Look that regret word.

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I often talk about regret being a dish that's best left unserved.

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No doubt about it.

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I mean it's one of those words and I've got a few of those from childhood as well, in terms of some of those choices that may be made but ultimately helped to shape how you are today.

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And I know that was in your book.

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As we get into that a little bit more, maybe not necessarily that story that I remember correctly, but that overcoming that pain and really dealing with that and changing your mindset a big part about what you've done.

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And, frankly, you had all that success in business.

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You've become so successful in life with regards to your fitness journey and that space, and you've also now turned it into an executive coaching opportunity.

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So for the last few years you've been an executive coach.

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So let's go there for a minute with regards to a choice, then we'll get into your book.

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But you made that decision back in 2021 to leave the corporate world.

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If you will and become an executive coach, tell me a little bit about that choice.

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What was there for you?

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Yeah, I went to my performance review in the March timeframe of 2021.

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And my wonderful boss, who I'm still friends with today, said to me you know, I'm going to retire in a few years.

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I think you might be a candidate to replace me and be the CEO of the organization, and for that to take place, I really want you to shore up your lending knowledge.

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It's the one vertical within financial services I had never led.

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I had wealth management, retail call centers, facilities, investment services just hadn't done lending.

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And so his charge to me was you know, get yourself to lending conferences, go meet chief lending officers If you're going to be a CEO someday.

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You know, get yourself to lending conferences, go meet chief lending officers If you're going to be a CEO someday.

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You've got to have that.

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And I should have been floored and excited here.

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The CEO of the company is telling me that I could potentially be his replacement.

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This was like the moment I thought I was waiting for my whole career and I went home and I realized I felt nothing.

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I felt kind of flat about it and I thought I should be excited and enthused about this.

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Why aren't I?

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And, as I did, some soul searching over the next few weeks.

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What I realized is, you know, I've got this vision, this dream, this passion that has been nagging at me for years and I'm not doing anything about it.

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And this dream I have, which has kind of been a little bit silent until this point, is to end up like Tony Robbins and be on stage in front of thousands of people and writing books.

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And I realized my heart was in coaching and consulting and talking with people about their belief systems, not in writing board reports and not in looking at the financials and not in running a financial services company.

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So I realized I owed it to myself to go back and tell them the truth.

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It was a little nerve wracking to be courageous enough and say you know, I don't think I actually want to be the CEO of a financial services company.

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I appreciate the opportunity and the offer and your trust in me, but I think if I were to, you know, fall off this earth tomorrow because something unexpected, that regret I would regret never having gone for it and tried.

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And as the great leader my boss was um would say.

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He said but what are you waiting for then?

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Why don't you go do it?

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I don't have life coach and executive coach and consultant.

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There's a job description here, but I want to support you in becoming exactly who you want to be.

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And so, um, within the next six months, I transitioned out of the business.

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Super scary and terrifying, really, to strike out on my own after so many years in corporate America.

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But I realized that I would just wonder if I didn't do it, what if?

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And I didn't want to wonder what if, and so I struck out on my own in fall of 2021.

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I won't say I haven't looked back.

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There's been moments where it's been really hard and challenging, as running our own businesses are.

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There's been moments where it's been really hard and challenging, as running our own businesses are, but it has been worth it because at night I say I'm going to bed doing what I feel I'm intended to do my calling, why I was put on this earth.

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I'm aligned with that now.

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So, yeah, that's kind of how I got started.

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Okay, amy, I can't express and hear that basketball story in there as well in terms of that regret that went along with it.

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You didn't want that.

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That's what I hear.

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You didn't even say that, but that's what I hear in terms of saying something you've had a dream about, that you wanted to do and going after it.

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You've got many of those stories.

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I can't wait to talk about those, but let's do it.

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Thank you for sharing that.

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By the way, it was a little like that when I got into coaching in August 2020, and like that when I got into coaching in August 2020, so not too far before you had the opportunity to do that as well.

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And leaving the security of the corporate world, the salary that exists there and all the things that come along with it, the leadership of many people to the leading of three me myself and I is quite a big change.

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So I can understand and relate to some of those feelings that you had, including the looking back and saying did I really do the right thing?

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So I know I am where I'm supposed to be as well.

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Your book is the Six Habits of Powerful People.

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It came after the Seven Virtues of Exceptional Leaders, both acronyms.

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I love acronyms in books.

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They make it so much easier to memorize.

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But the Six Habits of Powerful People, specifically, international bestseller.

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What prompted you to write that book and who did you write it for?

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Yeah, I wrote the book for anybody that has this vision of an ideal life and has dreams of becoming something, but isn't or at least to that point hasn't been able to make it happen, and no matter what they try or how many times they think about it, it just isn't coming to life for them.

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And so what I identified was that there's these habits or these practices for us to turn our dreams into reality that we've got to adhere to on a consistent basis.

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And so I really wanted to talk to the person that says you know, I have kind of this vision for my job or my relationship or my health and fitness or my family or my marriage, but I'm not living it.

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It isn't the same as what I see in front of me today, and I just don't know how to bridge that gap.

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I just don't know how to get there.

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So I wrote the book for them, and I think I wrote it because I had met enough of these people.

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And I think I wrote it because I had met enough of these people and I could hear the pain in their stories.

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They talked about the some days Well, someday when I have a little more time, or someday when I have a little more money, I'm going to do this.

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Or if money wasn't a factor, this is what I'd be doing with my life.

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Or if I could do anything, I would do this, but it would always sort of end with yeah, but too bad, I can't because of all of these reasons, which I really saw more as excuses.

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And so, as I listened to these individuals, all I heard was unfulfilled potential, you know, dissatisfaction with some aspect of their life, some helplessness like of you know, I'd love to change it if I could, but I can't and some holes in their mindset.

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And I thought I've got to write a book for these people, because the reality is, I think it's a majority of us that struggle with these kinds of things.

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And so, yeah, I was listening to so many people tell me that they're not where they want to be, but they didn't know how to get there.

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I said I've got to do something about that.

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Folks, I encourage you to get this book.

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We're going to dive into some of the details of it, but the stories inside the book that you share are also your stories.

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And again, another thing that I sensed there is that you know we are most powerfully positioned to help the person we once were, and I can sense that in terms of some of your stories, that you were once in that same position with regards to many things, whether it was the fear of skiing, the mindset of do I really want to be a runner or not be a runner, and getting through that.

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That's just in your health life, but also in your work life as well and personal life.

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So the stories help to make the book and I look forward to talking about a couple of those.

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So I'll go through the acronym real fast.

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The H is for have honest humility, a is for act, b is for brief, easy for you to say Befriend your brain.

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I is inspire yourself, t is trust and treasure yourself, and the S, which finished it off, is stay securely strong.

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So I liked reading through the different ones.

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There were a couple that caught me and we'll just take them out of order a little bit.

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The one that caught me the most was trust and treasure yourself.

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And again, it might be because that's where I probably see myself as needing a little bit more of that, but you told a story that I think was really cool and I'd like you to share with the listeners a sixth grade car story that impacted you and I just I don't want to say anymore.

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I want to let you tell that story and what that means for you.

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So for some reason, when you went after the tea I thought it's going to be the shop class that I had in sixth grade.

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He's going to pick on that, and you sure did.

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You're very perceptive and insightful.

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That's probably one of the most impactful things I wrote about in that section.

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So I'm in sixth grade.

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We all had to take woodworking or shop or whatever we'd call it today, and we were building cars.

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It was kind of a cool process.

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You'd build kind of this wooden car and then you'd make the wheels on this sort of shell injection machine and paint it whatever color.

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And then at the end of the project you know three, four weeks we raced them down this ramp to see whose car could get the farthest, and we had other teachers become the judges of this and there were some awards at stake, one for the speed and just whose car did the best, but another one for aesthetic design.

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And I got kind of into this.

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I just it made sense to me, I was doing really well and I worked really hard at it.

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I finished my car a couple of days before the other students and I decided I wanted to paint it kind of this cherry red, this bright red color.

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And then at the time, kind of tie dye or splatter was really cool.

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This is in the late nineties, so I'm dating myself here a little and I wanted to just splatter yellow paint.

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Oh oh, so I did and I was ahead of schedule and so my car was one of the first that was getting painted and sprayed and then drying.

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As the other students were kind of getting ready to go to that, and a few of the other students caught sight of what I was doing and they ridiculed me.

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They completely made fun of me why are you doing that?

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That looks dumb paint job and did the whole thing over.

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I painted it this blue as a base and then put some green stripes on it.

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And then, as we went to the competition, other students that had been behind me on this they went ahead and copied my original design idea.

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They had the splatter, they had the tie dye effect and I got angry about that.

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I almost couldn't believe it because it was like you made fun of me for doing that and that was the design I really wanted and I thought that looked awesome.

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You went and laughed at me for it.

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I got really embarrassed about it, completely scrapped it and then you went and did the same thing.

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So there was already that kind of uneasiness going on with me.

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But on the day of the competition we raced our cars, I did okay, finished kind of towards the top, but I didn't win.

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And after, like all the awards were handed out and I didn't get anything, my teacher pulled me aside and said you know, amy, I got to ask why did you change the color of paint on your car, like why'd you overhaul it?

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That was looking really good when you did that.

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And I said, oh, I don't know, I guess I just I just had a change of heart or something.

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And he knew better and I think he had sort of seen from afar what was happening.

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And he pushed on it a little and said are you sure that's it?

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It's not that maybe someone said something to you.

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And I began to cry and I remember sitting there with my sixth grade top shop teacher crying and him sort of digging into what had happened.

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And he said Amy, I want to tell you that if you hadn't done that, like changed your car and you had to redo the wheels to match and they kind of were rushed and they weren't as round and also you had this extra paint on your car and it was weighing it down, and you know you have now this design that wasn't really truly yours.

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I think you would have won at least one of the awards, if not awards in both categories.

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You had a really, really great car and right now you have a good car, but I think you made your car worse because of that feedback and I want you to understand that in this life, the most important thing is what do you think?

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Not what do other people think of you, but what is your heart telling you.

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And I think what happened here is you left behind your heart and your wants and your desires because of these other kids who, by the way, aren't even really your friends.

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I mean, this isn't part of your inner most trusted support circle.

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These are kind of like jerks and you're going to have a lot of people that are going to show up for you as long as you show up for yourself and if you believe in yourself.

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And it was a really hard conversation but I walked away from that and so many times in high school and in college.

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I'm still pretty young, but I was growing stronger in my convictions over who I was I went back to that moment with my sixth grade teacher and thought he's so right.

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I mean, this is exactly it.

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And I see a lot of adults still struggle with these things today.

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We get very interested in what other people think of us, but right there, as a 12-year-old girl, I got some of the best life advice I'd ever got, which is believe in yourself, trust yourself, listen to yourself, cherish yourself and definitely do those things more than what anybody else, especially strangers, are going to say to you.

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So I hope it was the way that you read it.

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That's what I remember about that story.

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That's exactly how I read it.

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And now we're two big stories from your childhood that have impacted your life and leadership.

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I just think it's so cool how it lines up with being able to share those stories with those that we coach and teach.

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Uh, that it's not.

00:17:36.728 --> 00:17:40.566
We're not just teaching them from a book, um, we're teaching them from from real experience.

00:17:40.566 --> 00:17:47.765
The other one that I found I found all of them interesting, but it's hard in 30 minutes to go through all of them and I think folks need to buy the book to go through all of them anyway.

00:17:48.375 --> 00:17:56.224
But number three, if I can say it, befriend your brain and one of the things you talked about and I think you've touched on this a little bit pain is a choice.

00:17:56.224 --> 00:18:01.171
So I find myself at times saying two things about pain.

00:18:01.171 --> 00:18:09.299
People will change when the pain of remaining the same is greater than the pain of the change itself.

00:18:09.299 --> 00:18:09.861
Discipline is tougher.

00:18:09.861 --> 00:18:13.067
You get to choose two pains One is regret and one is discipline.

00:18:13.067 --> 00:18:13.628
Choose your pain.

00:18:13.628 --> 00:18:19.707
A lot of different things, but to say that pain is 100% choice tell me what you mean by that in terms of pain being a choice.

00:18:20.674 --> 00:18:24.403
Yeah, and I think the way I put it in the book is pain is inevitable.

00:18:24.403 --> 00:18:25.907
We are going to have pain.

00:18:25.907 --> 00:18:29.099
Lots of things in life are very, very painful.

00:18:29.099 --> 00:18:31.164
Choosing to change is painful.

00:18:31.164 --> 00:18:32.877
Trying new things is painful.

00:18:32.877 --> 00:18:41.856
Being successful and working hard, consistent discipline, doing something over and over again just because you know it's right, regardless of whether you feel like it, that's painful.

00:18:41.856 --> 00:18:45.346
But the suffering, that's where I feel we get a choice.

00:18:45.346 --> 00:18:51.511
It's optional, it's really how we think about the pain and I do believe we have a choice in that.

00:18:51.854 --> 00:18:53.796
I remember the Viktor Frankl story.

00:18:53.796 --> 00:18:55.958
It was something written about in man Vs Meeting.

00:18:55.958 --> 00:19:21.457
He was a prisoner of war cannot take from me and they began noticing that Viktor Frankl was treating this differently and really were trying to figure out like what they could do to break him.

00:19:21.457 --> 00:19:29.846
But Viktor just basically said to himself I'm going to prove that psychologically I always have a choice in how I respond, and that was really intriguing to me.

00:19:29.846 --> 00:19:33.961
I thought, god, this guy's in a concentration camp, you know, potentially going to lose his life.

00:19:33.961 --> 00:19:35.844
He's watching people go to a gas chamber.

00:19:35.844 --> 00:19:42.480
I hope this isn't too graphic, by the way, but if he can choose his response in that kind of environment that has happened in our world history.

00:19:42.480 --> 00:19:49.575
I should be able to choose pain for hey, I got to go out and do a long run today because I'm working towards a marathon.

00:19:49.575 --> 00:19:57.885
Or I've got to go ahead and be courageous on a topic at work and my boss might not like it and I might get some pushback and that's going to feel uncomfortable.

00:19:57.885 --> 00:20:04.161
But if I am working towards something I truly believe in, I can accept that, I can tolerate that.

00:20:04.161 --> 00:20:05.806
I get a choice in how I feel about it.

00:20:05.806 --> 00:20:12.698
And so I began to test that, whether or not that was true, and what I found out is that we really do have a choice in how we feel about things.

00:20:12.698 --> 00:20:33.337
We can say, yeah, it might be a little painful, it might be difficult, but if I'm doing it because I believe that it's part of who I really want to become or it's because I have some dream or goal in the longterm that's important to me, it's much easier than to say I'll accept this pain and deal with kind of some suffering because it's getting me to where I want to go.

00:20:33.337 --> 00:20:38.767
And the more we practice looking at it that way, the more easy it becomes to naturally look at it that way.

00:20:39.228 --> 00:20:45.776
I love the Jim Collins, the pain of discipline.

00:20:45.776 --> 00:20:46.317
There's the pain of regret.

00:20:46.317 --> 00:20:46.898
I've experimented with that.

00:20:46.898 --> 00:20:48.281
We've talked a little about regret already on this call.

00:20:48.281 --> 00:20:49.444
The pain of regret is bigger.

00:20:49.444 --> 00:20:53.135
It really is very painful and sometimes it goes on for years.

00:20:53.135 --> 00:20:58.239
When you look back at something and say, gosh, I just should have, I should have gone for it, I should have tried for it.

00:20:58.239 --> 00:21:06.203
But the discipline there's pain there too, but it weighs nothing compared to that pain of regret and always wondering what if so?

00:21:06.203 --> 00:21:08.684
Yeah, these are interesting concepts.

00:21:08.684 --> 00:21:11.426
I think our subconscious mind tries to protect us.

00:21:11.426 --> 00:21:12.887
It doesn't want there to be any pain.

00:21:12.887 --> 00:21:20.872
But the reality is is we can teach our subconscious to kind of endure a little bit of pain to get to those things we really want with conscious choice.

00:21:21.553 --> 00:21:22.153
So spot on.

00:21:22.153 --> 00:21:40.219
I'm going to come back to that pain a little bit when we talk about your running here for a while, but you know, you've trained yourself to be a runner, you've been a leader of many, you have developed your skills in leadership and coaching and now you do that as an executive coach.

00:21:40.219 --> 00:21:46.478
So do you have an especially let's call it a favorite story of a client?

00:21:46.478 --> 00:21:52.982
You've helped and impacted by following these principles as well, realizing that it's not just you following them and you wrote about them, which is really cool.

00:21:52.982 --> 00:22:00.468
That's what we like is that the experience is inside of those words, but you've been giving that experience to others as well.

00:22:00.468 --> 00:22:01.596
Do you have a story that you really like?

00:22:01.596 --> 00:22:02.719
I do?

00:22:02.920 --> 00:22:04.123
I have a favorite client.

00:22:04.123 --> 00:22:06.268
I'm going to leave him nameless.

00:22:06.288 --> 00:22:16.376
That feels fair, but he's been with me since I started my coaching practice and I keep thinking at some point he's going to walk away because he'll have gotten everything he needs out of his relationship.

00:22:16.376 --> 00:22:23.721
And at some point he's going to walk away because he'll have gotten everything he needs out of his relationship, but after three years he is still moving the target and redefining the bar for what he wants to accomplish.

00:22:23.721 --> 00:22:25.982
It's just been amazing what he's been able to do.

00:22:25.982 --> 00:22:31.086
When I met him, there was a lot of beliefs that were there from his childhood.

00:22:31.086 --> 00:22:38.191
I'd argue that he had a belief in regards to some things that he just wasn't good enough, he hadn't gone to college.

00:22:38.191 --> 00:22:39.971
I think that really stuck with him.

00:22:39.971 --> 00:22:42.113
That, you know, that's just not for me.

00:22:42.113 --> 00:22:48.752
The people that are going to be highly successful in a professional environment are going to be people with college degrees or master's degrees, and I don't.

00:22:48.752 --> 00:22:49.402
I don't have that.

00:22:49.855 --> 00:22:59.240
He was nervous to be in a gym because he had been bullied a lot when he was a young boy and told hey, you're not really athletic, you don't belong here, and so he kind of was like this isn't for me.

00:22:59.240 --> 00:23:01.157
I'm afraid if I go there they're all going to kind of.

00:23:01.157 --> 00:23:01.921
You know, look at me.

00:23:01.921 --> 00:23:08.236
He was, I think, probably being somewhat verbally and mentally abused by his leader and his boss.

00:23:08.236 --> 00:23:12.007
You know, this is kind of what you're going to do with your career.

00:23:12.007 --> 00:23:17.517
Don't think beyond my team.

00:23:17.517 --> 00:23:26.714
You work for me instead of hey, we want to develop you as great talent for the organization and through all of the things we're talking about, there's a choice in how we respond, and the most important thing we can do is figure out what can we control.

00:23:26.714 --> 00:23:28.398
It's not about what's happening to us.

00:23:28.398 --> 00:23:33.156
It's about the choices we make in response to those things, and we can change our beliefs.

00:23:33.156 --> 00:23:42.136
We don't have to operate with these paradigms that we were given in childhood and many of them might just be stories, these things we're telling ourselves about ourselves.

00:23:42.136 --> 00:23:47.087
But as we talked through all of that, he went on and has done so much.

00:23:47.087 --> 00:23:50.401
He's gotten a much better role at work.

00:23:50.401 --> 00:23:53.247
He's now a well-paid relationship manager.

00:23:53.247 --> 00:23:55.377
He deals with very high-end clients.

00:23:55.377 --> 00:23:57.020
He's moved to a different commercial bank.

00:23:57.020 --> 00:23:59.365
He's taken on leadership roles.

00:23:59.365 --> 00:24:00.807
He's got a boss now.

00:24:00.807 --> 00:24:03.299
That is putting him up for all sorts of opportunities.

00:24:03.902 --> 00:24:08.622
He's tested and gotten his Series 7 and all the corresponding license to sell investments.

00:24:08.622 --> 00:24:11.492
He's gone back to school and been getting A's.

00:24:11.492 --> 00:24:12.856
He's nearing graduation.

00:24:12.856 --> 00:24:19.719
He now has completed over 100 sessions or classes at Barry's Boot Camp and he lives up in San Francisco.

00:24:19.719 --> 00:24:22.486
It's a pretty aggressive fitness center.

00:24:22.486 --> 00:24:24.818
From what I understand, it's not for the weak of heart.

00:24:24.818 --> 00:24:30.846
It sounds more aggressive than CrossFit and he fits in there and he's got a whole cohort of those.

00:24:31.234 --> 00:24:43.395
He's been asked by his company to travel around the country and host these high-end clients at various events, including the US Open, and it's so neat to hear him continually redefining what's possible for himself.

00:24:43.395 --> 00:24:45.280
He was afraid of skiing, just like I was.

00:24:45.280 --> 00:24:50.306
He's now going on annual ski trips with some of his closest friends, bought his dream house.

00:24:50.306 --> 00:24:56.987
All of these things have been made possible because he was willing to overturn these things of like.

00:24:56.987 --> 00:24:59.804
Eh, maybe a six-figure salary is all I'm really cut out for.

00:24:59.804 --> 00:25:03.705
Maybe I didn't do well in college the first time I tried it.

00:25:03.705 --> 00:25:05.121
I probably can't do well now.

00:25:05.535 --> 00:25:10.867
An investment series license oh gosh, I don't think I could ever test or be considered for that.

00:25:10.867 --> 00:25:13.663
I just don't know if they're going to give me a team to lead.

00:25:13.663 --> 00:25:20.596
I better stay an individual contributor, one by one.

00:25:20.596 --> 00:25:22.084
He has learned that just by asking for things and believing in himself.

00:25:22.084 --> 00:25:23.048
And whether you think you can or think you can.

00:25:23.048 --> 00:25:25.602
Either way, you're right by deciding that he can and then saying I will.

00:25:25.602 --> 00:25:33.464
He has been able to do all sorts of things, and seeing where he's at now in life versus where he was three years ago has been amazing.

00:25:33.464 --> 00:25:42.472
He's probably one of my favorite success stories, but it all started with some simple changes in how he saw himself and what he believed was possible for himself.

00:25:42.472 --> 00:25:44.558
So, yeah, he's probably one of my favorite clients.

00:25:45.622 --> 00:25:48.798
Hey listeners, I want to take a quick moment to share something special with you.

00:25:48.798 --> 00:25:56.761
Many of the topics and discussions we have on this podcast are areas where I provide coaching and consulting services for individuals and organizations.

00:25:56.761 --> 00:26:10.184
If you've been inspired by our conversation and are seeking a catalyst for change in your own life or within your team, I invite you to visit coachjohngallaghercom forward slash free call to sign up for a free coaching call with me.

00:26:10.184 --> 00:26:18.196
It's an opportunity for us to connect, discuss your unique challenges and explore how coaching or consulting can benefit you and your team.

00:26:18.196 --> 00:26:20.942
Okay, let's get back to the show.

00:26:20.942 --> 00:26:27.058
Those limiting beliefs can be crippling when you can help someone overcome that.

00:26:27.058 --> 00:26:28.163
Amy, that's pretty powerful.

00:26:28.163 --> 00:26:33.449
Thanks for sharing that story and I'm sure absolutely he's appreciative of the coaching that you provide.

00:26:33.449 --> 00:26:35.876
You've quoted several leaders.

00:26:35.876 --> 00:26:37.261
I mean Jim Collins you talked about.

00:26:37.261 --> 00:26:37.502
You know.

00:26:37.502 --> 00:26:38.238
Victor Franklin's got.

00:26:38.238 --> 00:26:42.363
You know the book that would be there, many, many quotes that you have throughout your book.

00:26:42.363 --> 00:26:47.059
Is there a specific book that has impacted you the most in your personal growth?

00:26:47.662 --> 00:26:48.525
Yeah, there's a few.

00:26:48.525 --> 00:26:53.366
Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey changed my life.

00:26:53.366 --> 00:27:01.805
When I read those seven habits and thought about how I was practicing them and living them each day, everything changed for me.

00:27:01.805 --> 00:27:06.845
Simple stuff like just starting with the end in mind and saying where do I want to end up in 10 years?

00:27:06.845 --> 00:27:08.659
And then let me work backwards.

00:27:08.659 --> 00:27:10.404
That was transformative.

00:27:10.404 --> 00:27:24.121
Carol Dweck's mindset that is really where I got the concept of the fixed mindset, where we view mistakes and failures as bad and to be avoided, and the growth mindset where we view those things as learning opportunities to challenge us and evolve us.

00:27:24.121 --> 00:27:27.758
And then, from a leadership standpoint, liz Wiseman's Multipliers.

00:27:27.758 --> 00:27:30.407
It mirrors the seven virtues really well.

00:27:30.428 --> 00:27:35.703
When I read that book I had already been outlining the leadership book I wanted to write and I thought, oh my gosh, this is my book.

00:27:35.703 --> 00:27:37.186
She's literally written my book.

00:27:37.186 --> 00:27:39.881
But there the concepts are all about.

00:27:39.881 --> 00:27:44.644
It isn't about you as the leader, it's about how you can help other people be great.

00:27:44.644 --> 00:27:48.363
It's not about what you know, it's about unleashing what they know.

00:27:48.363 --> 00:28:02.479
And so it really it's servant leadership kind of shifts this idea on its head of you know, you've got to be successful and have all the answers, it's like no, you've got to actually ask all the questions and help other people be successful, and that is my belief of what leadership really is.

00:28:02.479 --> 00:28:08.239
So, so those three books are probably the three most um impactful books I've I've read of of many.

00:28:08.920 --> 00:28:09.981
Excellent, let's.

00:28:09.981 --> 00:28:10.221
Uh.

00:28:10.221 --> 00:28:14.007
So the six habits are the seven virtues.

00:28:14.007 --> 00:28:15.348
Folks are going to read your book.

00:28:15.348 --> 00:28:16.590
They're going to put it up on a bookshelf.

00:28:16.590 --> 00:28:18.520
You've got a bookshelf behind you, I've got one behind me.

00:28:18.520 --> 00:28:26.626
Those are watching on YouTube and they're going to see your book sitting up there on the shelf after they've read it, maybe a year ago.

00:28:26.626 --> 00:28:27.409
What do you want them to think?

00:28:27.409 --> 00:28:30.785
What do you want them to do when they see your book sitting up on the shelf after they've read it?

00:28:40.734 --> 00:28:41.576
Yeah, I would like them to think.

00:28:41.576 --> 00:28:52.798
This framework, this model, these habits are a daily, consistent answer to any problem I'm having, whether it's some struggles in the personal relationship, whether it's I want to lose some weight and get in better shape, or whether it's I want to be more valued at work.

00:28:52.798 --> 00:29:09.826
These habits inside that book are the way forward, they're the answer, and so I want people to refer back to it time and time again when they're struggling with motivation or they're talking negatively to themselves or they just don't feel that something's aligned.

00:29:09.826 --> 00:29:13.623
I want them to go back to those pages and read those stories, read the quotes.

00:29:13.623 --> 00:29:21.623
There's some action items for day-to-day use that they can start implementing right away, and those practices aren't a one-time thing.

00:29:21.623 --> 00:29:23.884
They are a constant discipline.

00:29:23.884 --> 00:29:30.420
I have to refer back to my own book with new problems and challenges to remind myself that the work is never done.

00:29:30.420 --> 00:29:31.384
It's a lifelong journey.

00:29:31.384 --> 00:29:38.685
So when they see that book on the shelf, I would like them to know that it is the way forward with anything really, not just one thing.

00:29:39.587 --> 00:29:40.897
Love that when you think about that.

00:29:40.897 --> 00:29:48.625
I want to lose a little weight, I want to be a better leader Very, very vague, and I know there's some specificity to that that you've talked about inside your book as well.

00:29:48.625 --> 00:30:06.448
I've used a quote often says good intention without discipline leads to excuses, but good discipline with good intention leads to excellence, and I think those are things that can really be powerful for us and maybe that one can go in your next book that you got coming out in terms of putting that quote in there.

00:30:06.448 --> 00:30:20.990
I'm curious what are one or two daily habits you have that keep you in shape, both physically and maybe from a personal development standpoint, on the leadership side as well?

00:30:21.494 --> 00:30:33.789
You said daily, but I'll give you something that I think it's important to do on a weekly basis to start the week by identifying the most important one, two or three things that have to get done at all costs.

00:30:33.789 --> 00:30:36.279
That will help the person become the person they want to be.

00:30:36.279 --> 00:30:41.096
So often I see people living their life in this reactive place.

00:30:41.096 --> 00:30:45.184
Oh, I get up, I check my email, I respond to people's requests.

00:30:45.184 --> 00:30:52.362
If someone asks me to do something and I care about their opinion because they might be my boss or my boss's boss, I will jump at it.

00:30:52.362 --> 00:30:57.442
And so then, whatever time is left over, that's where they put these important things.

00:30:57.442 --> 00:30:59.655
And I say nope, run that in reverse.

00:30:59.655 --> 00:31:04.067
Start by giving yourself an hour, hour and a half at the beginning of each week.

00:31:04.067 --> 00:31:19.765
Prioritize and strategize and say what are my wildly important goals, these things I really want to accomplish to advance my business, my life, my weight and fitness and health journey, my career, and then where are they going to go?

00:31:19.765 --> 00:31:20.849
On my calendar, I'm putting it on Tuesday afternoon.

00:31:20.849 --> 00:31:21.614
It's going to take place at this time.

00:31:21.614 --> 00:31:26.266
If it really has to be rescheduled, then they would pick it up and find another spot for it.

00:31:26.626 --> 00:31:33.954
And one of my favorite quotes from that, stephen Covey's Seven Habits of Highly Effective People is it's easier to say no when you have a greater yes in mind.

00:31:33.954 --> 00:31:36.401
This produces the greater yes.

00:31:36.401 --> 00:31:41.637
This weekly regimen of okay, so I'm training for a marathon, I got to run 20 miles.

00:31:41.637 --> 00:31:43.923
Where is that long run taking place?

00:31:43.923 --> 00:31:45.126
Okay, it's Saturday morning.

00:31:45.126 --> 00:31:56.099
So that way, when on Friday night someone says, hey, let's do brunch tomorrow, let's meet up, you can say no, I'm so sorry, I wish I could, but I already have something sitting there and I have to remain committed to it.

00:31:56.181 --> 00:32:01.382
Doing that, planning my calendar a week in advance and then each day checking in to say did I make all my commitments today?

00:32:01.382 --> 00:32:03.446
That changed everything for me.

00:32:03.446 --> 00:32:07.223
It put me in a much more strategic position, much more proactive position.

00:32:07.223 --> 00:32:09.497
When people would ask me hey, do you have time for this?

00:32:09.497 --> 00:32:18.679
I would be able to communicate from a position of strength and power and say I'd love to, but unfortunately I'm just not able to because I've actually got something I've deemed more important.

00:32:18.679 --> 00:32:21.886
That is in the way of that and I've got to stay true to that.

00:32:22.494 --> 00:32:25.041
That's probably the number one thing.

00:32:25.041 --> 00:32:25.763
Yes for two.

00:32:25.763 --> 00:32:26.866
So I'll give you a quick one.

00:32:26.866 --> 00:32:35.450
It's to celebrate small wins, I think, each week, identifying what two, three, four things am I proud of having done this week.

00:32:35.450 --> 00:32:39.311
It really helps us keep our motivation and inspiration up to keep going.

00:32:39.311 --> 00:32:54.965
When those times get tough and it's raining and we don't feel like it, oftentimes we wait till the journey to celebrate and the destination and we forget about that journey and that process and so slowing down and saying I'm going to choose to be proud of myself just for these little things as I go, that's what gets us to that process.

00:32:54.965 --> 00:33:00.720
And so slowing down and saying I'm going to choose to be proud of myself just for these little things as I go, that's what gets us to that destination, and so making a point to acknowledge our accomplishments along the way.

00:33:00.720 --> 00:33:01.863
I do that every week.

00:33:01.863 --> 00:33:03.855
So those are the top two, I'd say.

00:33:04.195 --> 00:33:04.616
Love that.

00:33:04.616 --> 00:33:11.505
From I'm not a runner to 14,000 miles plus running.

00:33:11.505 --> 00:33:16.131
What are the mindset shift you had to go through to do that?

00:33:17.234 --> 00:33:32.204
Yeah, that was probably the way the first real way I proved to myself that all of the concepts in the book and everything you've asked me about today were true, and so I had heard about these concepts through my boss the same boss that encouraged me to leave the company.

00:33:32.204 --> 00:33:35.028
When I said I have this big dream and he said well, what are you waiting for?

00:33:35.028 --> 00:33:35.751
Go chase it.

00:33:35.751 --> 00:33:37.678
I'm going to cheer you on from afar.

00:33:37.678 --> 00:33:47.951
That individual had been saying things like life is hard, but we can do hard things, and failures and mistakes are part of success, not opposed to success.

00:33:47.951 --> 00:33:51.902
And, no matter what is happening, you get to choose your response.

00:33:51.902 --> 00:33:54.667
And, yeah, pain is inevitable, but suffering is a choice.

00:33:54.667 --> 00:34:03.428
It's a choice you're making to say that's just too painful, I don't want to do it, and I had gotten a little intrigued, you know, by running in the previous few years.

00:34:03.428 --> 00:34:08.085
But at the very end of 2015, I went through a breakup and it was traumatic for me.

00:34:08.085 --> 00:34:09.315
I was devastated.

00:34:09.315 --> 00:34:13.061
I thought this guy and I were going to get married and it was sort of abrupt in my mind.

00:34:13.061 --> 00:34:17.429
And when he left and ended our relationship, I was really kind of ripped apart.

00:34:17.429 --> 00:34:21.184
The one thing that was giving me some peace and some strength is.

00:34:21.184 --> 00:34:33.282
I was going outside for these kind of long walks and I would see all these runners passing me and they were all at different paces and I began to just wonder, well, what if I can do hard things, and what if we can change things about ourselves?

00:34:33.282 --> 00:34:34.664
And what if it is just?

00:34:34.664 --> 00:34:38.530
You know, pain is a choice and I could just choose to not view it as painful.

00:34:38.530 --> 00:34:41.945
So I started jogging very slowly.

00:34:41.945 --> 00:34:44.523
I mean, we're talking and there's nothing wrong with this.

00:34:44.523 --> 00:34:48.827
I think pace is great for anybody, but is it like 13 minute miles?

00:34:48.827 --> 00:34:55.389
And I could maybe go five, six minutes and I had to take a walk break because I just felt like my lungs were gonna collapse.

00:34:55.389 --> 00:35:05.222
And over time, as I practiced that and kept kind of going back, I realized that my paces are coming down 12 minute miles, 11 minute miles, 10 minute miles, and I was able to do it longer.

00:35:05.222 --> 00:35:15.757
I could do a mile, I could do two, and so I challenged myself to do a 5K and I was so proud of myself when I completed that first 5k and it opened the door to well, what if I did a 10k?

00:35:15.757 --> 00:35:16.420
What if I could do that?

00:35:16.420 --> 00:35:26.804
What if I could run a half marathon, and when I crossed that first half marathon line, I became a changed person, because never in a million years as this non-running person I hated the mile in high school.

00:35:26.804 --> 00:35:28.268
Oh, don't make us run the mile.

00:35:28.268 --> 00:35:30.918
I thought I've actually grown to really enjoy this.

00:35:30.918 --> 00:35:32.501
What else is possible?

00:35:32.501 --> 00:35:36.208
And so then it became about meeting other runners in a running community.

00:35:36.208 --> 00:35:38.302
What if I could run all 50 states?

00:35:38.302 --> 00:35:39.621
What if I could run a full marathon?

00:35:39.621 --> 00:35:40.277
And one by one?

00:35:40.297 --> 00:35:45.822
What I've realized is each goal I've been able to achieve, but it all started with me believing that I could.

00:35:45.822 --> 00:36:04.922
So I really love running now, because it's the place that I taught myself that these things are true, and running gives me the strength and the courage and it reminds me that these principles apply to our professional lives as well, or our relationships, and so it's a good way to practice it and keep it fresh, because there are aspects of running I still find uncomfortable.

00:36:04.922 --> 00:36:11.184
Now, when I'm racing a 5K at closer to an eight minute mile or high sevens, I still struggle.

00:36:11.184 --> 00:36:12.769
And then I talk to myself.

00:36:12.769 --> 00:36:18.945
I talk myself through it hey, you're supposed to be struggling, you got half a mile to go and you're close to a PR.

00:36:18.945 --> 00:36:24.586
Obviously it's going to be hard, but you can do this and I like having a way to practice those mindset thoughts.

00:36:25.536 --> 00:36:26.418
Those conversations are cool.

00:36:26.418 --> 00:36:26.898
I love that.

00:36:26.898 --> 00:36:33.856
Thank you for sharing that, even tying it to your point all those points inside the book, Amy, how can folks stay in touch with you?

00:36:33.856 --> 00:36:34.880
This conversation has been great.

00:36:34.880 --> 00:36:40.409
I could keep going, but I know we're up against the wall on time and I just want to make sure that I'm honoring your time.

00:36:40.409 --> 00:36:42.677
But how do folks learn more about you and stay in touch?

00:36:43.077 --> 00:36:43.518
That's great.

00:36:43.518 --> 00:36:44.300
This has been wonderful.

00:36:44.300 --> 00:36:49.501
It's amymchamberscom is my website, so you can read about all my services on there.

00:36:49.501 --> 00:36:51.987
I'm on YouTube as Coach Amy Chambers.

00:36:51.987 --> 00:36:56.478
On there, I'm on YouTube as Coach Amy Chambers.

00:36:56.478 --> 00:36:57.139
On Instagram Amy M Chambers.

00:36:57.139 --> 00:36:57.760
Linkedin Amy Chambers.

00:36:57.760 --> 00:36:58.862
I'm on most social media platforms.

00:36:58.862 --> 00:37:02.208
I put out a video or two every week on these concepts.

00:37:02.208 --> 00:37:10.081
It's called Transformation Tuesday, so that's probably a very easy way to start kind of learning some of the things I believe in the mindset.

00:37:10.081 --> 00:37:12.135
And then, yeah, the books are on my website.

00:37:12.135 --> 00:37:18.262
If anyone wants to buy a book, the Virtues 10 gets people 10% off the Virtues book.

00:37:18.262 --> 00:37:23.907
Habits 10 gets folks 10% off the Habits book, and you'll find those books right on amymchamberscom.

00:37:23.907 --> 00:37:25.730
So that's the choice.

00:37:26.510 --> 00:37:27.632
Amy, it's been a great conversation.

00:37:27.632 --> 00:37:40.242
I'll put links to those things in the show notes as well, so that folks can get to it easily to go forward, and I would encourage those that are listening I'm sure you've heard something in this podcast that you need to share with someone, so please do that.

00:37:40.242 --> 00:37:48.155
Just take a chance and click that share button or the subscribe button so folks know, and the other side is to give it a review so we can get this in front of even more people.

00:37:48.155 --> 00:37:51.202
So I would appreciate that, amy, I do appreciate.

00:37:51.202 --> 00:37:54.929
Mostly, though, is your time invested with the listeners the Uncommon Leader podcast.

00:37:54.929 --> 00:37:55.168
Today.

00:37:55.168 --> 00:38:00.155
I'll give you the last word here, and that's the last question I always ask my guests, but I'll give you a billboard.

00:38:00.155 --> 00:38:01.760
You can put that billboard anywhere.

00:38:01.760 --> 00:38:05.003
You want to put whatever message you want to on that billboard.

00:38:05.003 --> 00:38:06.782
What's the message and why?

00:38:06.782 --> 00:38:44.014
So maybe that's two questions I'll finish with no-transcript.

00:38:44.114 --> 00:38:45.943
yeah see, I'm right, I just can't do that.

00:38:45.943 --> 00:38:50.376
So it all starts with us choosing to believe that we can accomplish something.

00:38:50.376 --> 00:38:51.840
That's where all the magic happens.

00:38:51.840 --> 00:38:53.623
So that's what I'll leave folks with today, John.

00:38:54.724 --> 00:38:55.565
Amy, thank you so much.

00:38:55.565 --> 00:38:58.739
I thought that was attributed to Lou Holtz in his book Winning Every Day.

00:38:58.739 --> 00:39:09.557
By the way, notre Dame grad alumni like you are, we would try to pick that up, but I don't think Lou Holtz came up with many of the original thoughts in terms of what went into his stuff.

00:39:09.557 --> 00:39:11.400
But thank you so much for sharing with the listeners.

00:39:11.400 --> 00:39:12.804
Again, amy, I wish you the best.

00:39:12.804 --> 00:39:14.226
Hope we stay in touch.

00:39:14.786 --> 00:39:15.588
John, you're incredible.

00:39:15.588 --> 00:39:16.050
Thanks so much.

00:39:19.436 --> 00:39:22.204
And that wraps up another episode of the Uncommon Leader Podcast.

00:39:22.204 --> 00:39:23.347
Thanks for tuning in today.

00:39:23.347 --> 00:39:30.824
If you found value in this episode, I encourage you to share it with your friends, colleagues or anyone else who could benefit from the insights and inspiration we've shared.

00:39:30.824 --> 00:39:37.463
Also, if you have a moment, I'd greatly appreciate if you could leave a rating and review on your favorite podcast platform.

00:39:37.463 --> 00:39:45.318
Your feedback not only helps us to improve, but it also helps others discover the podcast and join our growing community of uncommon leaders.

00:39:45.318 --> 00:39:48.327
Until next time, go and grow champions.